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  • San Andreas

    San Andreas 2015

    ★★★½ Watched 26 Jun, 2015

    There are several things that I found very unbelievable in this movie, and literally none of them have to do with the big-ass earthquakes.

    I simply could not buy that fuckin' creepy-eyed Alexandra Daddario as The Rock's teenage daughter. I just could not wrap my head around the fact that anyone would ever want to divorce the always adorable Dwayne for any reason. And for the love of god I just could not believe how terribly cliche and cringeworthy 99.9%…

  • Jurassic World

    Jurassic World 2015

    ★★★ Watched 19 Jun, 2015

    First can I just say that I forgot how annoying it is to be in a theater full of other people? I go to movies alone almost always, during emptier hours, and bask in the emptiness that is the theater almost every time. But me being an idiot forgot that today is a Friday during the Summer(sorta) and this is a family-friendly movie(sorta) and not only do people other than me exist(gross), children exist(gross).

    A child a few rows in…

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  • Taken

    Taken 2008

    ★★★★½ Rewatched 27 Feb, 2014

    Whatever, I love this movie. And although I'm sure my own father would try his best to rescue me, I'd like to officially request that Liam Neeson be the one assigned to come after me if I ever get kidnapped and sold into human trafficking. He seems to know his way around an International kidnapping, whereas my dad knows his way around Pawn Stars and getting the best deals on deli meats.

  • Bad Boys

    Bad Boys 1995

    ★★★★½ Watched 25 Mar, 2014 11

    Man, Bad Boys is so much stupid motherfuckin' fun. Emphasis on stupid. Annnnd on motherfuckin'.