Featuring performances so catty it should be sponsored by Whiskas, Curtains is a mess of campness, OTT eye-acting and nonsensical plotting that nonetheless delivers entertainment and some suspense.

Featuring a scene where the hag mask wearing killer stalks a young woman ON ICE SKATES (the lass isn't even on the frozen pond at this stage, the killer could simply have sauntered over - but where's the style in that? Plus, how often so psycho killers get to show off their other talents? Multi-tasking. I like it!), a hideous doll that has no connection to the plot (or to sense for that matter) and a questionable sex scene between a beauty and someone who looks like 80s children's entertainer Bob Carolgees wearing a stocking over his head (?) it's down to the fabulous eye-rolling performances, especially that of the wonderful Samantha Eggar and a pretty taut scene at the end, where things suddenly start getting serious as one character is stalked through a props room strung with hanging mannequins. It's trashy, high camp cheese at its best. Not for all, but if your idea of a slasher features middle aged crazy dames, women sitting around, drinking scotch, behaving lewdly and being vile to one another rather than idiotic teens running idiotically through a wood, then put your feet up, crack open the scotch and cackle along.