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  • The Verdict

    The Verdict 1982

    ★★★★½ Watched 29 Apr, 2015

    Eff yeah, Paul Newman, Slayer of Justice! Take THAT, nefarious wrongdoers of the world: you've just been SERVED!

  • Furious 7

    Furious 7 2015

    ★★½ Watched 28 Apr, 2015 2

    Hey, look! It's The Rock… holding a rock!

    HAHAHAHAHA… okay, never mind. This movie has seriously grossed more than a billion actual dollars?!

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  • Hook

    Hook 1991

    ★★★★½ Rewatched 04 Mar, 2012 6

    One of those rare cinematic curiosities where you can tell instantly how old someone was when they first saw the film based upon their reaction to it today.

    It goes like this: almost without exception, those who first saw Hook as an adult will—by virtue of being a horrible grown-up—completely and utterly loathe the film, detesting everything it represents about cinema today. They will deride Hook as bloated and indulgent; treacly Spielbergian sentimentality run amuck; and, worst of all—*gasp*—totally made-up,…

  • Man of Steel

    Man of Steel 2013

    ★½ Watched 25 Jun, 2013 5

    Ah, summer... *BUILDING SMASH*

    There's noth-*COLLAPSING TOWER*-ing like the *CAR HURLING TOWARD US* good old *ENTIRE SKYSCRAPER FLOOR WIPED OUT* Hollywood *BAD GUYS DECIMATES 7-ELEVEN* summer *MASSIVE GAS-FUELED FIRE ERUPTION* blockbuster *EXPLOSION* treatment *EVEN BIGGER EXPLOSION* to make you apprec-*FALLING BUILDING WAY TOO CLOSE TO OUR HERO'S GIRLFRIEND FOR COMFORT*-iate a fant-*FIREBALL*-astic *CAR SMASH* story *EXPLOSION* like *MINI-EXPLOSION* Super-*HERO SAVES INNOCENT BYSTANDER JUST IN TIME*-man. It's great, *HERO THROWN THROUGH THREE BUILDINGS* isn't it?

    *FIERY EXPLOSION* *FLAMING INFERO* *BIG CHUNKS…