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  • Pixels

    Pixels 2015

    ★★★★ Watched 27 Jan, 2016

    This seemed more like a classic Adam Sandler comedy minus the screaming Sandler. I don't know why this is the first Chris Columbus/Adam Sandler film, but it needs to happen again. It was a perfect family friendly comedy.

    It was a nice bonus that they got the actual Max Headroom too. I recognized his voice instantly!

  • Hitman: Agent 47

    Hitman: Agent 47 2015

    ★★ Watched 26 Jan, 2016

    Just another movie based on a great series of games turned into shit movies. I did enjoy some of the kills that mirrored the games. I liked Rupert Friend as Agent 47, buy Timothy Olyphant was infinitely better.

  • The Tournament

    The Tournament 2009

    ★★½ Watched 18 Jan, 2016

    A bunch of hitmen try and kill each other until there's a last man standing. This is definitely one of those b-movies you watch and instantly forget. The action was nice and always fast paced though, and the movie is fulfilling as an action film. I basically watched this for Kelly Hu, but Ving Rhames, Robert Carlyle, and Liam Cunningham were also a pleasure to see as usual.

  • John Wick

    John Wick 2014

    ★★★ Watched 03 Jan, 2016

    This was a nice action/revenge flick. I really enjoyed the shootouts and the way he seemed to move around in them reminded me a lot of Hit-Girl from Kick-Ass.

  • Terminator Genisys

    Terminator Genisys 2015

    ★★½ Watched 29 Dec, 2015

    I didn't hate this nearly as much as I thought I would. I guess that's something.
    I did like how they aged the terminator.

  • Zombie Hunter

    Zombie Hunter 2013

    ★½ Watched 29 Dec, 2015

    I would think you would have to really have to work hard to find actors this bad. Was it on purpose for B-movie effect? If so, they are tremendous actors because I believed it thoroughly. The CGI was worse than 90s CGI. And to make matters even worse, the slutty zombie fodder never showed their tits. This film was a disappointment all around. Danny Trejo was his usual bad-ass self, but he's not in this film nearly enough.
    Overall this was a good movie to have on in the background, but don't set the bar too high.

  • Better Living Through Chemistry

    Better Living Through Chemistry 2014

    ★★★ Watched 28 Dec, 2015

    Just a run of the mill movie. It works best when it's trying not to be funny. If you like Sam Rockwell and Olivia Wilde give it a try (basically the only reason I watched this), otherwise maybe pass on this. It was on Netflix Instant.

  • Star Wars: The Force Awakens

    Star Wars: The Force Awakens 2015

    ★★★★ Watched 27 Dec, 2015

    This felt like a true and proper sequel to the original trilogy. I hope we get many more Star Wars films like this one.

    This was definitely worth seeing in IMAX 3D. I thought the space ship battles were awesome (I could swear the destroyer was about to hit me in the forehead), then the light saber battle happened and it felt like I was right there watching them fight it out!

  • Die Hard

    Die Hard 1988

    ★★★★★ Rewatched 24 Dec, 2015 1

    Merry Christmas to all and to all a yippee ki yay mother fucker!

  • The Equalizer

    The Equalizer 2014

    ★★★★ Watched 19 Dec, 2015

    Home Depot is a fucking death trap. I'll never look at one the same again. It was like Home Alone with death.
    Also, when I open up my Russian-international drug/guns/women empire, I'll remember not to be too strong with my pimp hand. The entire film could have been avoided. Maybe if my hos get out of line, I'll just give them a fairly harsh yearly review.

  • Jodi Arias: Dirty Little Secret

    Jodi Arias: Dirty Little Secret 2013

    ★★½ Watched 12 Dec, 2015

    This contains one of the deepest scenes in cinema history. While the two are in their hot tub, Jodi tells her boyfriend that she's converting to his religion, then proceeds to go underwater to give him a blowie. The scene cuts immediately to her emerging out of the water of her baptism. Kubrick himself couldn't have made a better editing segue.
    Why do I continue to watch Lifetime movies?

  • The Lazarus Effect

    The Lazarus Effect 2015

    ★★½ Watched 07 Dec, 2015 1

    This was like a horror version of Lucy. Olivia Wilde was good, but I wish there was a larger cast so they could have had more deaths.