I went into this assuming I was gonna get a fun, mindless slasher flick.

What I got was one of the creepiest and most unnerving movies I've seen in a long while. Fantastic acting, legitimate scares and a dark nihilism throughout that leaves you truly disturbed. A forgotten masterpiece.

I'm starting a new public service campaign called "No Saturn=No Sex." Basically, if anyone has sex on a night when Saturn is not visible, my gestapo of abstinence commandos will swarm the scene and bam bam double-tap headshot both of the offenders. In the case of threesomes, foursomes, cuckolds, fivesomes, interracial sex, sodomy, oral sex, 69s, reverse-cowgirl riding parties, sixsomes, gay sex, coprophagic fetish feasts, sorority house hazing ceremonies, and sevensomes, the punishment will be the same.

P.S. That Curtis dude looks exactly like my dad when he was a kid. Maybe it actually is my dad and this film is his legacy. Obviously my abstinence gestapo has failed.

These kids ain't playin'.

Sure it's a little weird to see 10-year-old kids strangle someone with a jump rope. Or shoot people. With a gun and a bow and arrow. Or put a bag on their head and try to run someone down with a car in a junkyard. But damn if it ain't entertaining.

"Bloody Birthday" presents the child murderers with an alarming calmness. It's just who they are. After the shock wears off, the film becomes somewhat repetitive and loses momentum, but not enough to be completely derailed.

Part of Horrortober 2012.

Mediocre horror film, it is interesting enough because the kids are the villains and it is a slice of 80's horror history. I think I need to re-watch it soon as I may have been slightly inebriated when I did watch it.

This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.

While the beginning and the ending never really makes sense (why did the eclipse make three kids go bad?), the movie is consistently entertaining just for the sheer fact that you're watching a movie about three ten your old kids murdering people. It also helps that the film is well-crafted and made with some skill.

I'm starting a new public service campaign called "No Saturn=No Sex." Basically, if anyone has sex on a night when Saturn is not visible, my gestapo of abstinence commandos will swarm the scene and bam bam double-tap headshot both of the offenders. In the case of threesomes, foursomes, cuckolds, fivesomes, interracial sex, sodomy, oral sex, 69s, reverse-cowgirl riding parties, sixsomes, gay sex, coprophagic fetish feasts, sorority house hazing ceremonies, and sevensomes, the punishment will be the same.

P.S. That Curtis dude looks exactly like my dad when he was a kid. Maybe it actually is my dad and this film is his legacy. Obviously my abstinence gestapo has failed.

Mediocre horror film, it is interesting enough because the kids are the villains and it is a slice of 80's horror history. I think I need to re-watch it soon as I may have been slightly inebriated when I did watch it.

This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.

This is a fun "killer kids" movie with a preposterous reason to explain the killer kids, there are memorable setpieces which made this worth the watch. Also, the awesome scene with Julie Brown undressing in her bedroom as the two boy killers peep through a peephole while an awesome pop-rock song plays in the background... that was memorable too!

I adore it forevermore

Kids suck.

A good underrated 80's slasher. It's a bit campy and it has that entertainment that is found in other 80's slashers like Madman, Silent Night Deadly Night, Hell Night, The Burning and Funhouse. The kids are creepy in this too. It has that slasher camp. It's an enjoyable slasher film. If you like horror, slasher films more specifically, check it out. Worth a watch.

When are people going to believe me? Young children are evil. Pure evil.