Everyone has at least one film they like that everyone else seems to hate. Maybe they didn't get it. Maybe…
Cowboys & Aliens
First Contact. Last Stand.
A stranger stumbles into the desert town of Absolution with no memory of his past and a futuristic shackle around his wrist. With the help of mysterious beauty Ella and the iron-fisted Colonel Dolarhyde, he finds himself leading an unlikely posse of cowboys, outlaws, and Apache warriors against a common enemy from beyond this world in an epic showdown for survival.
This film is actually (generously speaking) retarded. Makes no sense and I was lost after 20 minutes, it got me in a knot that I never seemed to get out of until the end credits. For those who have watched this, try and answer these questions?
Why are there aliens?
Why is there a boat randomly in the desert?
Why does Lonergan have a arm brace that kills aliens?
Why are the aliens on Earth?
Why do the Aliens want gold, of all things?
Why is that alien women Ella Swenson relevant to anything? |
I will admit that I saw this on a plane, so maybe I've marked it half a star lower than I should, but still... There's just no excuse for a movie to be so dumb and pointless. This must have been inspired by the Snakes on a Plane team. Just so dumb.
To summarize: a too-cool-to-be-true cowboy (Daniel "James Bond" Craig, no less!!) wakes up with no memory, and some inexplicable alien weaponry attached to his hand. He's a stranger in a strange land, etc, etc. there are bad guys and really bad guys. The twist comes soon enough. There are some really really bad guys from outer space. They are super warriors and they can't be stopped. They're here…
I feel like I should be applauding the iota of originality that this Hollywood movie rides in to town with. Instead I'm left ruing, considering the premise, what could have been and longing to watch all of Firefly again.
Too many writers in the kitchen spoil the juicy genre mashup broth.
Seriously, how did they make something that should be awesome so dull? Did no one read the script and go "Hey wait a minute!"?
I actually dug this a lot. It's really stupid but it entertained me for the two hours. One of the better guilty pleasures of the year for me.
The american theme - cowboys vs. "the others".
Weitestgehend getregen durch die Darsteller. Trotzdem geht dem ganzen irgendwann die Luft aus, obwohl die Actionschraube weiter angedreht wird bis zum Finale. Ein paar nette Ideen helfen dem Ganzen aber nicht über 3 Sterne.
This much mediocrity offends me.
A complete lack of fire, energy and excitement almost from the opening scene, only Paul Dano has any interest in being in the movie...and he is mostly manic to the point of near absurdity the entire time. Just a bore.
my dad thought he would like this because cowboys then when we got done watching he said quote on quote "That was possibly one of the gayest cowboy movies i've ever seen."
I remember I was going to go to the cinema to see this but I got sick and couldn’t go. Is this proof of intelligent design? Was my illness God or the universe’s way of saving me from spending £20 on a trip to see Cowboys & Aliens, something that I probably would’ve never forgiven myself for and would have changed how I saw myself as a human being and more importantly as a man? I guess I’ll never know for sure.
Think of a B-movie made with the money of a blockbuster that takes itself too seriously and is too decently produced that it's extremely boring and has no value whatsoever.
Think of that with an out of place Daniel Craig.
A great cast, strong production, and the germ of a clever idea come together with a weak script and result in a disappointingly bad film.
I like several of the actors here, and they all seem to do their best, but there's not much for them to work with.
The idea of the lone stranger, with a secret, is a common one in Westerns. Of course, in those movies, at least the stranger is in on his own secret. Additionally, though the movies of the past has just as many side characters, they don't need to to resolve a relationship for each (usually in the most predictable way).
Too many characters and too many things going on, though it did not seem enough cowboys for the big fight.
I remember watching this in the theater and texting like a moron on my phone. Even though I was tuning in and out every few minutes or so, I still remembered just about everything that happened In the movie. I haven't texted in a movie before or since seeing COWBOYS & ALIENS, but maybe it wasn't just a supernatural occurrence that I chose that movie to do so. Perhaps C&A is just a bland movie with nothing interesting or entertaining happening at all. Maybe I remembered everything in the movie because there is not a shred of originality in its' entire runtime and every character arc is absolutely predictable from the very beginning. Not horrible, but not good either, and that's disappointing considering its' awesomely simplistic high-concept title, talented cast, and witty director, this could've and should've been something wild. It ain't.
Don't text during movies.
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- Epic Movie
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- Meet the Spartans
- The Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence)
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They've been compiled, and here they are!…
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