Each week I'll post a new letter and all you have to do is nominate a film that you think…
Crank: High Voltage
He was dead...But he got better
Chelios faces a Chinese mobster who has stolen his nearly indestructible heart and replaced it with a battery-powered ticker that requires regular jolts of electricity to keep working.
While I prefer the original as it had a more cohesive plot and the silliness was kept down to a mild roar!
I can also appreciate this one for its extreme excesses!
T and A!
Kinky Sex in Public!
Movies like these exist in another realm. They do not make sense. They are proud of it. They celebrate a full-testosterone, chauvinistic, sexist, semi-pornographic, parodic, overtly violent and electricity-charged tsunami of the ideas that precocious adolescents under the influence of nerve-altering hallucinogenics would have if given lots of budget, a camera and lots of porn actors incuding Ron Jeremy in the cast to work for them in order to party with basically everything that is wrong with our insane society.
Yes, I love it. This is art.
A tracking shot might be moral
But no morals here.
"NO! My Hermes handbag!"
Fuck You de cinema.
An immoral cinema
Is also a free cinema.
Not a spectacle we want
But a spectacle we deserve.
Crank 2: High Voltage is everything you'd expect from the sequel to Crank. Uglier! Sexister! Racister! More homophobicer! Over-the-topier! And if Crank wasn't quite enough for you, you'll probably prefer this one. But for me, Crank hit the exact line of ridiculousness. There's too much repetition, too much tits, and too overt (yeah, kind of a silly complaint about these movies but) a way of showing the themes. The repetition of the news anchor, in particular, never worked for me.
But it's still an insane and enjoyable second installment in this series. Highlights include the intertitle that announces, "9 SECONDS LATER" and when Chev and the man he's been chasing for most of the movie become kaiju style puppets and…
Crank 2: I Can't Believe We Got Away With Making Another One of These
There's a bit where Jason Statham kills three people in a limo, says "Chicken... And broccoli!" for absolutely no reason, then dives out before it crashes. Even more ridiculous than the first film, and that also counts against it, but, you know what? It's Crank. I doubt there will ever be a time in which I do not want to see a film in which Jason Statham plugs an electricity pylon into his balls.
It's like the movie stops halfway through every scene and decides it's going to be a porno. 'The Expendables' is a good example of a good action movie that doesn't take itself too seriously; 'Crank' doesn't take itself seriously at all.
The first Crank movie was far from great but really cool and entertaining nonetheless. This sequel tries to repeat the formula but this time increasing its implausibility up to the maximum. Its more comedic approach was a nice touch, but in general, it wasn't as entertaining and satisfying as its predecessor.
If you liked the first, you'll love the second; yes, more of the same OTT shenanigans delivering high octane fun all the way, and of course leaving the door open for perhaps another crazy movie!
Goddamn, a third Crank movie needs to happen.
Are you listening, Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor? Make Crank 3.
It's like if Lloyd Kaufman took every drug imaginable right after a late night of playing video games, maury povich, Godzilla, and MTV
If I could travel back in time 100 years to show people one film from the future, I'd show them Crank. I'd also show them Crank: High Voltage.
If you didn't like Crank you won't like the sequel since they're basically the same movie. I think both of these movies are masterpieces for what they are, absolutely insane action movies filled with some incredible over the top set pieces and extremely creative camerawork from Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor. The duo has definitely proved themselves as some of the best and definitely the most unique action directors out there. There really isn't anyone who does what these guys do.
Even if someone didn't like the Crank movies, even they'd have to admit how freakin creative these movies are. Hopefully there will one day be Crank 3, but I like that they're taking their time with .
Silly fun... ridiculous and ostentatious
I just....I have no words. On some perverse plane of existence this qualifies as "art", and I think it may just be the one we are living on.
- Celine and Julie Go Boating
- City of Life and Death
- City of God
- The Super Inframan
- Cheap Thrills
- Enter the Void
- Evil Bong
- Love Exposure
- Tetsuo: The Iron Man
- Ginger Snaps
This will serve as my ever-changing list of favorite films. In order.
Click See Notes to see links to my…