Step One: Go to www.random.org.
Step Two: Pick a Number.
Step Three: GET WEIRD!
There are a thousand ways to raise your adrenaline. Today, Chev Chelios will need every single one.
Professional assassin Chev Chelios learns his rival has injected him with a poison that will kill him if his heart rate drops.
This is a better remake of Speed, with Statham being the bus
Does it look like I got cunt written on my head? Who do you think you are fucking with?
Crank is an experience unlike any other. Being strapped down to a chair in a dark room and getting doped up with any and every drug under the sun designed to increase your heart rate and perspiration all the while being surrounded by dozens of TV sets blaring fragmented heavy metal music videos is the only comparable physical equivalent.
A nightmare to some**
But to a select few, Crank is a transcendent experience that has "cult status" written on its forehead. No, not the word "cunt." This film on the outside appears to be an eccentric, sleazy, stupid, dumbfoundedly bizarre…
I have a bad cold at the moment and needed to find a way to kick myself out of my dopey state, something which it turns out can be achieved by watching the heart-pounding Crank; a film that'll make you feel like a man even if you’re not man at all.
While this Speed-inspired action movie does come across a bit like an energy drink commercial at times, it features an iconic Statham role and really couldn’t give a rat’s ass what you think about it. It’s a film to make you feel tough as nails as the stone-faced Brit shows off his most agile badassery while engaging in extreme substance abuse and political incorrectness.
Crank is by no means…
Um... I have no idea how to review this movie. It is illogical, weird, dumb, but ITS FUN! I have never been a big fan of Jason Statham and his over the top action movies, but I kinda like this one.
Crank is, in a sense, awful. I mean it's really, really dreadful. It looks as though a madman managed to get the entire editorial facilities of a cheap piece of software, give it a chunk of footage, and randomly select one style for each scene. It's mad. It's absolutely mad. It makes no sense at all. And that's precisely why I liked it so much. No film I have ever seen better evidences the purposes of beginning a narrative in media res: "in the middle of things". It's maybe half an hour before you're given any idea whatsoever of what's actually happening, so frenetic is the pacing of the action. Normally such mania…
About a third of the way in, Chev Chelios (Jason Statham) is standing in a hospital gown at a bay of TV screens. The report on the screens is about him, and what he has already "accomplished" so far in the film. One dead, others injured, hundreds of thousands of dollars of property damage. A man looks at Chev, recognizes him as the man wanted by the police, and then looks back at the TV screens.
When I watch action movies, I often find myself acting like this stranger who, rather than respond in any way to the mayhem in front of him, turns back to the screen. I see the toll each of these films diegetically leaves in its…
Holy shit, what did I just watch! I'm not sure if Crank is so bad it's good, or just bad; a zero or a five. So I'll split in down the middle and give it 2.5.
Filme de ação frenético, engraçado e meio retardado, gostei.
It's crazy, but I thought it would be crazier
Too bad this has to have a plot because the 20 minute or so stretch where Statham runs around in a hospital gown would be a short comedic masterpiece.
"Wanna hold hands?"
Crank still resides as one of the most over-the-top and experimental action films ever made.
If you haven't seen it, do it now. It is literally the most insane film ever.
Einfach nur der krankeste Film den es gibt. Richtig geil 😂
On some Anne Haitian shit.
I came to this party late. Strangely I feel as though it had come and gone unnoticed - but that might just be the circles I move in. The reason I said strangely is because from the get-go till the woah-bro I had some of the best time I have ever had watching a movie. The plot, directing and acting all combined to make a solid piece of entertainment.
My favourite part is confirming my appreciation of what Jason Statham brings to the table. I had previously believed he was one of those airhead action heroes you could watch on mute if you needed that sort of titillation. Au contraire the man has substance and oodles of it. His dry…
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