Drive Angry
2011 Directed by Patrick Lussier
Synopsis
All hell breaks loose
Milton, a hardened felon who has broken out of hell intends on finding the vicious cult who brutally murdered his daughter and kidnapped her baby. He joins forces with Piper, a sexy tough-as-nails waitress with a 69 Charger, who's also seeking redemption of her own. Caught in a deadly race against time, Milton has 3 days to avoid capture, avenge his daughters death, and save her baby before she's mercilessly sacrificed by the cult.
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Dear scriptwriter,
Ok, so first off, it's Drive Angrily, ok?
The fact that you apparently do not possess enough cognitive capacity to grasp that does not excuse you from:
- writing dialogue shitly
- writing your plot craply
- making everything dully
You should thank God on your bare knees that someone cast Heardly, Cagely and Fichtnerly.
They save this film.
Kindaly.
Yours sincerelyly,Me
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In this one Nicolas Cage takes sips from a bottle of whiskey, smokes a giant cigar, and kills a bunch of evil redneck satanists without taking his dick out of a waitress. What's not to like?
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This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.
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Holy crap - was this written by a ten year old!?
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Nic Cage escapes from hell to rescue his granddaughter from a satanic cult who killed his daughter. That is a really awesome premise, right? Just me then?
It’s impossible to comprehend the ridiculousness of a movie such as Drive Angry so I’ll just list a bunch of the crazy shit that ensues. Here it goes... A man gets nailed to a wall with a baseball bat, Cage drives a car while it’s on fire, A guy slashes his head with his own sword, He drinks out of a skull, He has a massive shootout while carrying a naked stripper and above all the incredible ridiculousness of this movie, wait for it, SPOILER ALERT SPOILER ALERT......... Cage gets shot in the…
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Oh Nic you loveable nutter dont ever change
special awesome points go to William Fichtner as well. I couldn't stop smiling
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Okay, I'm not gonna waste time and write a proper review with sentences and stuff.
- Why the undead angle? Why not make a classic car film with some shootouts? Would probably have been better since now it comes off as try-hard different and just plain ridiculous.
- Cage just does his thing, nothing special there.
- The direction of the action scenes and the film in general was dilettantish.
- Special effects looked okay-ish at their best and just plain bad at their worst.
- Why did Piper go with him? What was her motivation for driving around the country and shooting COPS? Seriously. She just murdered two of them for no reason. Shitty writing.The three best things about this movie are:
- matt black 1969 Dodge Charger
- Amber Heard's everything
- "That's the way I like it"They don't actually manage to save it, though. Wouldn't watch again.
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Galhofa mal feita.
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Okay so before you watch this - which you should -, expect the following:
A bright-blonde Nic Cage escaping Hell in a muscle car, repeatedly being referred to as 'a badass motherfucker' by William Fichtner from the off.If that wasn't enough, let me get you some more:
Your brain might randomly stop working throughout the film. Seriously, there is no need for it whatsoever.
If said brain IS somehow still running, you might shake your head in disbelief at some of the lines uttered. Literally, it happens.
You might also tip your metaphorical trash lover's hat at some of the lines uttered. Guaran-fucking-teed.
You might actually be surprised by how stylish and well-shot this piece of crap can be… -
Why is it that whenever I watch a film this bad Nicolas Cage is always acting in it?
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Nicolas Cage tries so hard to be sexy. But he's not. He's old, but not distinguished. And that hairline... oh, that hairline... CREEPY! Quit trying to hide what everyone can blatantly see, Mr. Cage.
All-in-all, a fun flick. But very stupid.
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Call me crazy, but i thoroughly enjoyed this movie.
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I'm feeling a little frisky, so let's do a little something different...
<u>Cons</u>:
- Nicolas Cage. The man seemingly will make any movie offered to him. What happened to the guy that made Adaptation. and Matchstick Men? Not only does Cage continue to churn out shit movies, but his acting is beyond terrible. There are so many actors that would've played this role better.
- The special effects. Holy shit, I've seen better effects on SyFy made-for-TV movies. Seriously.
- The fact that Drive Angry feels like it's trying way too hard to be a cult/exploitation classic. So much of the action and dialogue feels forced, which is never a good thing.
- Amber Heard doesn't get naked. Enough said.… -
Two thumbs up! No good reasons to list except I've always enjoyed Patrick Lussier's films.
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I'm still not sure what is going on in this movie. I don't know exactly whats it's about. I don't give a shit. Like Roger Ebert wrote of him, "In a good film, Nic Cage is an asset. In a bad one, he is indespensible". Amber Heard is very good and manages to hold her own and not get blown off the screen by Rage-Cage.