bad things happening to eyes. you know the drill
Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood
Jason is back, but this time someone's waiting!
Tina possesses the gift of telekinesis, allowing her to move things and see the future, using the power of her mind. But when a devious doctor tries to exploit her ability, the gift becomes a hellish curse. Tina unwittingly unchains the merciless bloodthirsty Jason Voorhees from his watery grave, igniting a bloodbath that ends in the ultimate showdown in strength of mind versus pure evil matter.
First and foremost, it should be known that of all the well-known horror franchises the Friday the 13th series is my favorite. I think of the other long-running, highly successful series like: Halloween, A Nightmare on Elm Street and to a much lesser extent, Hellraiser, and Friday the 13th has the overall best track record. I enjoy each sequel almost on an equal level with a few minor exceptions, whereas I only like one sequel from the Halloween series. With 10 movies strictly involving Jason Voorhees (excluding Freddy vs Jason and that remake), I enjoyed all of them (enjoyed may be a strong term for Jason Takes Manhattan but I didn't hate it).
The slasher boom had basically two prototypes…
Kane Hodder weed wacking the good doctor. Melissa a real bitch but a sweetheart. Nick one of the smartest characters in the entire franchise. Tina the worst final girl. A WTF ending. The saving grace: Robin's boobs.
There's a legend around here. A killer buried, but NOT dead. A curse on Crystal Lake, a death curse. Jason Voorhees' curse.
Back from the Ottawa Comiccon and I have the urgent need to rewatch a few films because of certain interactions I had there. It was my first experience at any type of convention like that and I have to say I had a blast. Being a horror fan the biggest draw for me going there were guests Bruce Campbell, Robert Englund and Kane Hodder. Little did I know Hodder would leave the biggest impression on me.
May 9th, 2014 is the day I first met Kane Hodder and started realizing just how awesome he is. The first…
Though it's hokier touches and some formula tediousness undercut the strengths of "Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood," this chapter of the lengthy horror franchise earns points for adding, uh, new blood to the plot. This new blood comes in the form of a telekinetic teen who, ultimately, battles the hulking Jason Voorhees in an attempt to vanquish the lumbering stalker. It all makes for a watchable genre film.
The film has its share of weaknesses, but its addition of the telekinetic character enlivens the narrative. That narrative misses ample opportunities to set off in new and more interesting directions and eventually loses steam as it settles into its traditional formula of violent slayings, but it has a…
Bad news Crews.
Someone needs to make a film called Crystal Lake Realtors because selling ice to Eskimos would be a walk in the park to these real estate agents. Crystal Lake and it's small community have been witness to over 60 killings at this point taking place during 5 mass murders over the course of 12 to 15 years. Yet it doesn't seem to effect the real estate much as people are still buying and renting cabins around Crystal Lake.
My math on that could be fuzzy as I'm roughing it, and I'm only counting 5 mass murders because I don't think Part V: A New Beginning actually takes place anywhere near Crystal Lake. Also the 12-15…
Back to the dumpster. The editing is horrendous, the acting is terrible and the humor is mostly gone. Fucking recaps... I thought they were done with that. Worst Schwarzenegger impression of all times. Some potentially good kills ruined by MPAA. The sleeping bag kill was shown uncut in theaters, the victim being hit six times against the tree with the bag covered in blood, instead of just one quick hit in all other versions. Wish I would have been around to see that. Jason's dispatch tools are varied. What did he do, robbed a shed? Tina, the final girl has telekinetic powers. Couple that with a horrible performance and it almost turns into a curiosity. The nice guy who tries…
There are a variety of interesting franchise twists in this episode, but it is a formal nightmare.
The frustrating thing is this one actually had a lot going for it. Almost all of the human characters are fairly distinct and either likable or unlikable in interesting ways, and the sleeping bag kill is pretty easily one of the best kills in the series to this point. Unfortunately, someone decided it would be a really great idea to make the main character a psychic for no apparent reason (some hogwash about her guilt about her father's death giving her psychic powers, I don't know) and make the film's climax a really underwhelming fight between her and Jason. So, yeah, I guess that's technically an idea... how it didn't get shot down by anyone is beyond me.
I had to go back deep in my memory and I realized I had never never seen this film. Once I saw a documentary or tv program or something on Friday the 13th so I remembered clips and the overall storyline, but I hadn't actually seen this because I specifically remember when I watched all of the series one day I was sick, this was the only one that wasn't available on demand and I was so mad.
Looking back, I wasn't missing much. Granted, I love the change in formula, a little bit. I liked that Jason actually had a foe that was more or less using their talents rather than playing McGuyver. I think making Tina a psychic was equally creative as it was an idea that sort of backfired in a sense of overall tone of the film.
Also, that was by far the one of the worst resolutions to any film I've seen.
In honor of Friday the 13th, as a horror fan it was only right to watch one of the Jason movies. I chose one I didn't remember much of and one I'm not entirely sure I've seen all the way through.
This is the one with the psychic girl which against all odds actually works. In a universe where jason can be brought back to life with a lightning bolt and just wake up after a dozen years chained to a rock under water, of course there is a girl with telekinetic power. Don't question it, just accept it and enjoy the mayhem.
Now I know this one was chopped all to hell at release but could they have at…
F13 VII underdelivers on the promise of some Jason ass whooping when it leaves the clash between the unkillable killer and the new last girl, one that happens to be empowered with a supremely reliable form of telekinesis, to the near end. Before then, we have to endure formulaic kills, exacerbated by many of those being somewhat implied. The ending is sheer stupidity and the "heroine" pretty weak all along. Whoever did the casting, hatchet in the back - figuratively speaking, of course.
Same formula, a super menacing Jason and a new final girl with special powers. It's sad how bad the kills were edited, a few happen so fast and chopped that they feel off paced. Still, a solid Friday the 13th sequel with enough blood and bad character decisions to keep any fan entertained.
You ever wonder what would happen if Jason met Carrie? Me neither but apparently someone did and it was fucking great!
An unconvincing psychic takes on zombie Jason - at one point throwing a pot plant with a severed head in the pot at him.
Little to differentiate from the previous instalments - not as good as Final Chapter or Jason Lives. Again - no real imaginative deaths and little to explain the franchises longevity and popularity.
This one actually inspired the "put that thing back where it came from or so help me" song from Monsters Inc
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