I've always been interested in what other people are seeing and watching, and naturally, I love looking at Weekend Box…
G.I. Joe: Retaliation
Framed for crimes against the country, the G.I. Joe team is terminated by Presidential order. This forces the G.I. Joes into not only fighting their mortal enemy Cobra; they are forced to contend with threats from within the government that jeopardize their very existence.
For all its undeniable crappiness I do have a fondness for the original G.I. Joe movie as I warmed to its cheesy charms and Sienna Miller dressed in leather. However, Stephen Sommers’ film was not the runaway success the studio expected and because of this the delayed sequel has seen wholesale changes. With the exception of the odd franchise favourite, most notably Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes, the original cast have been unceremoniously dumped in favour of a new breed of blander Joe.
Although it follows on from the first film, not that anybody can really remember the original’s plot, the GI Joe team are ruthlessly streamlined leaving a core of five Joes against the might of a growing Cobra…
Being a child of the 80s my go-to toy was of course G.I. Joe. Other then the toys, the cartoon was cool and all but it always bothered me that they had laser beams shooting out of every single weapon they had. Machine gun, pistol, tank cannon, it didn't matter. If it shoots, it shoots a laser beam. Even as a kid I thought that was bullshit.
For me I got my G.I. Joe fix from the Marvel Comics published G.I. Joe comic. The series was surprisingly realistic when it came to covert ops and military tactics. It was written by Larry Hama, a former firearms and explosive ordnance expert for the U.S. Army that served in…
The film goes thus:
Kind of funny dialogue.
The Rock's absurd neck (seriously, it's as wide as his head!) and shoulders.
Holy shit that was unexpected.
Cobra Commander actually looks and sounds like Cobra Commander.
Ninjas sword-fighting while abseiling.
Jonathan Pryce being so hammy you could slice him up and make a sandwich.
More of The Rock's absurd neck and shoulders.
Misogynistic jabs by Bruce Willis at the resident action chick.
Surprising emphasis on gunplay and hand to hand combat rather than explosions.
Actually rooting for Cobra so I can see more Jonathan Pryce.
Damn, that trailer spoiled A LOT.
Massive epic climax.
Yeah, it was good.
A lot of people are saying that this is better than the first, and I have to call a bit of bullshit on that. As inoffensive as this film is, it is also on the opposite spectrum of stupid fun that Rise of Cobra is.
See, as dumb as Rise of Cobra is, it at least knows it, and lends itself to its own nice little campy tone. It runs with the stupid instead of trying to hide it, and I find that infinitely more enjoyable.
Retaliation, while not masquerading as anything more than dumb fun, doesn't have the same campy tone. It takes everything in the film a little too seriously, and thus, when something insanely stupid happens…
"They call it water board, but I never get bored"
A few years ago, when I was but a young and naive FilmApe, I longed for the days when B movies existed, and cursed the modern days where all movies are just lumped together as one thing that are all comparable to each other. But, then it occurred to me that I was looking at things all wrong and that a new perspective would help me see things better. It is not like B movies stopped being made, they just got elevated to a status where they are no longer considered B movies. So, I began to look for films that are the modern equivalent of what use to be…
Things G.I. Joe: Retaliation have:
Soldiers, minion soldiers, white ninja, black ninja, yellow ninja, red ninja, minion ninjas, ninjutsu, brawl, martial arts, parkour, free running, fencing, sai, kunai, sword, sword fight, flying sword fights, hiking sword fights, hiking, wall running, wall running sword fight bangee jump, bangee jump sword fight, zip-line, zip-line sword fight, sword fight with firearms, gunkata, gunfight, revolvers, pistols, machine guns, sub-machine guns, heavy machine guns, mounted machine guns, sniper rifles, sniper rifles with guided bullets, grenade launcher, grenade, anti-aircraft weapons, missile launcher, nuke, nuke explosion, exploding firefly, people with cool names like Firefly, Cobra Commander, Roadblock, Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes, Snake and Cobra being enemies, city being destroy, helicopter attack, gunfight with cars, house full…
I don't want to come off as one of those annoying super fans who nitpicks everything, but they didn't mention pork chop sandwiches ONE TIME! RZA was super awesome as Splinter though.
2/10: I have already set my expectation very low for this movie, but it was to no avail. I was still disappointed. If not for some Ninja actions in the movie, I would not even give any ratings. Yeah it's that bad.
No one to blame but myself for being sucked in by the prospect of seeing this in 3D on my home theatre. I should have, and honestly did, know better.
Woeful storyline, ridiculous character beats, only one decent action scene, and the 3D even sucked.
Should rank in my worst 10 viewings of the year list to be published soon.
Just a retread of common action tropes. Nothing much to see here unless you dig explosions.
My review -- this film is now showing at Hollywood cinema Norwich UK and it has already made a profit margin of roughly $10 million but to be fair it has only been out since 28 March 2013 and it made its budget back of roughly $130 million so with that being said I am pretty sure there will be a sequel [not to give any of the storyline away I just base my opinion on the financial aspect only.] The storyline/contents well us as viewers meet the task force known as G.I. Joe's again as they are given this mission to recover and disarm some nuclear warheads, but unknown to them something goes wrong and the country that they…
Even though I enjoyed the first Gi Joe film, it wasn't exactly what I wanted from a live action Gi Joe movie. The sequel improves upon every single aspect and gives you the Joe film you wanted to see the first time around. It definitely feels like the cartoon in style, and execution.
Gi Joe:Retaliation has big action, some fun moments, and the characters are more faithful to the cartoon as well this time around. Even Cobra Commander looks exactly like he does in the series, and they have actual Cobra tanks and planes.
At the time this was set to be released, I didn't care for Channing Tatum, but now I think the film is not as good because…
The couple scenes where The Rock and Channing Tatum are on-screen together are extremely fun. Unfortunately that's only a few minutes of the movie, and the rest of the flick is pretty meandering. Hoping for a proper Rock/Tatum teamup at some point!
Dwayne Johnson es el amo de las secuelas, spin-offs y remakes. ¿No os habías fijado? La momia 2, El Rey Escorpión, Be Cool, La isla misteriosa y demás secuelas anunciadas de Viaje al centro de la Tierra, Fast and Furious 5 y siguientes, La montaña mágica...
Y ésta, claro. Pura carne de videoclub.
¿Lo que más me ha interesado? Byung-hun Lee, el combate en las montañas, algunos diseños y un Jonathan Pryce que se lo pasa bomba haciendo de malo.
Es una chorradita pero según cómo te pille se deja ver, y a mí me pilló bien.
In which... the sequel is slightly more tolerable watching than the original somehow... maybe it's the shorter run time at least.
- Sharky's Machine
- Absence of Malice
- On Golden Pond
- Richard Pryor: Live on the Sunset Strip
- The Wolf of Wall Street
- Inside Llewyn Davis
- American Hustle
I rank all the 2013 films I see in my personal order from best to worst!
- 12 Years a Slave
- Inside Llewyn Davis
- The Wolf of Wall Street
- Upstream Color
- Before Midnight
This is my ongoing ranking of all the films I see released in 2013. I will make a separate top…