These are films that I've seen over the years that I've either liked or loved, but A LOT of people…
G.I. Joe: Retaliation
Framed for crimes against the country, the G.I. Joe team is terminated by Presidential order. This forces the G.I. Joes into not only fighting their mortal enemy Cobra; they are forced to contend with threats from within the government that jeopardize their very existence.
For all its undeniable crappiness I do have a fondness for the original G.I. Joe movie as I warmed to its cheesy charms and Sienna Miller dressed in leather. However, Stephen Sommers’ film was not the runaway success the studio expected and because of this the delayed sequel has seen wholesale changes. With the exception of the odd franchise favourite, most notably Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes, the original cast have been unceremoniously dumped in favour of a new breed of blander Joe.
Although it follows on from the first film, not that anybody can really remember the original’s plot, the GI Joe team are ruthlessly streamlined leaving a core of five Joes against the might of a growing Cobra…
The film goes thus:
Kind of funny dialogue.
The Rock's absurd neck (seriously, it's as wide as his head!) and shoulders.
Holy shit that was unexpected.
Cobra Commander actually looks and sounds like Cobra Commander.
Ninjas sword-fighting while abseiling.
Jonathan Pryce being so hammy you could slice him up and make a sandwich.
More of The Rock's absurd neck and shoulders.
Misogynistic jabs by Bruce Willis at the resident action chick.
Surprising emphasis on gunplay and hand to hand combat rather than explosions.
Actually rooting for Cobra so I can see more Jonathan Pryce.
Damn, that trailer spoiled A LOT.
Massive epic climax.
Yeah, it was good.
Being a child of the 80s my go-to toy was of course G.I. Joe. Other then the toys, the cartoon was cool and all but it always bothered me that they had laser beams shooting out of every single weapon they had. Machine gun, pistol, tank cannon, it didn't matter. If it shoots, it shoots a laser beam. Even as a kid I thought that was bullshit.
For me I got my G.I. Joe fix from the Marvel Comics published G.I. Joe comic. The series was surprisingly realistic when it came to covert ops and military tactics. It was written by Larry Hama, a former firearms and explosive ordnance expert for the U.S. Army that served in…
A lot of people are saying that this is better than the first, and I have to call a bit of bullshit on that. As inoffensive as this film is, it is also on the opposite spectrum of stupid fun that Rise of Cobra is.
See, as dumb as Rise of Cobra is, it at least knows it, and lends itself to its own nice little campy tone. It runs with the stupid instead of trying to hide it, and I find that infinitely more enjoyable.
Retaliation, while not masquerading as anything more than dumb fun, doesn't have the same campy tone. It takes everything in the film a little too seriously, and thus, when something insanely stupid happens…
"They call it water board, but I never get bored"
A few years ago, when I was but a young and naive FilmApe, I longed for the days when B movies existed, and cursed the modern days where all movies are just lumped together as one thing that are all comparable to each other. But, then it occurred to me that I was looking at things all wrong and that a new perspective would help me see things better. It is not like B movies stopped being made, they just got elevated to a status where they are no longer considered B movies. So, I began to look for films that are the modern equivalent of what use to be…
Junesploitation: Day 11 – Ninjas!
"I don’t know if I’m gonna trust a pastry from a gumbo chef."
G.I. Joe: Retaliation functions best if you look at it not as the sequel to the previous G.I. Joe movie Rise of Cobra (which I liked in spite of its silliness) but as part of director Jon M. Chu’s filmography. His other work includes Step Up 2 and 3, both Justin Bieber documentaries, and two movies in a series called The LXD (you guessed it—also about dancing). With Retaliation, Chu isn’t making an action movie, he’s making a music video. Each set piece acts more like a dance number or concert performance, purposefully interrupting the flow of the narrative rather…
The 3D in the mountain scene was great
Fun. It's also cool that they didn't get into that american censor for killing people, because they actually kill a bunch of them.
The first hour is dull as dishwater, but once Jonathan Pryce starts setting off nukes and playing Angry Birds, the general tone becomes so stupid it stops being boring and starts being spectacular.
First off it's clear this movie was made by people who don't even remotely know or care about the brand other than the names and ranks. Poor casting they clearly blew there wad on The Rock. Channing Tatum and Bruce Willis's cameos took all they had left. If you thought the first one was bad everything you didn't like about it they did here only bigger. Im not saying it's easy to make a film about a toy line but come on look at Fucking Transformers. The writing here is bad to not what you would expect from the team that wrote Zombieland & Deadpool. Anyway fuck this film series and everyone who created it for getting my 11 year old…
A few things have changed since I was disappointed by this in theatres. Elodie Yung went on to portray Elektra in Marvel's Daredevil show. Adrianne Palicki went on to play Bobbi Morse in Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. The writers went on to make the script for Deadpool (which with Zombieland makes two out of three of their feature length screenplays two of my favourite movies). There also came about the extended action cut of this film. So with all of that in mind I decided to give it another shot.
My opinion of a movie hasn't changed this drastically in a long time. I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed this now as opposed to two and a…
Ridiculous plot. OK action. Clever imprisonment scheme.
One time watch action movie, I gave this movie 2 star because of rock... otherwise I would give this movie 1 star...
The G.I. Joe team is framed for crimes against the country by Zartan (Arnold Vosloo), disguised as the President (Jonathan Pryce), and Cobra Commander (Luke Bracey and Robert Baker) has all the world leaders under his influence, with their advanced warheads headed towards innocent populaces around the world. Outnumbered and outgunned, the surviving team members form a plan with their original leader, General Joe Colton (Bruce Willis), to rescue the President and face off Cobra Commander, his accomplices, and the world leaders.
G.I. Joe: Retaliation received marginally worse reviews than the first film, earning a 28% on Rotten Tomatoes compared to Rise of Cobra's 35%. However, the…