Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters
2013 Directed by Tommy Wirkola
Synopsis
Classic tale. New twist.
After getting a taste for blood as children, Hansel and Gretel have become the ultimate vigilantes, hell-bent on retribution. Now, unbeknownst to them, Hansel and Gretel have become the hunted, and must face an evil far greater than witches... their past.
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.....wait a second.......wasn't I supposed to hate this?
I am not a big fan of Hollywood's need to revamp all these classic fairytales. Most of them are excellent and grim stories to begin with, so why change that?
Take the fairytale of Hansel and Gretel for example. It's a story about child abuse, cannibalism and horrific murder. That in itself is more than enough, right? But no, riding on Snow White's coattails we now have the story of Hansel and Gretel post traumatic candy cottage experience.
This shouldn't work and plot wise it doesn't. It is somewhat uninspired and therefore doesn't really hold any surprises. It also has a couple of bizarre ideas that aren't really fleshed out enough (Hansel's…
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Mi crítica para Inferno, tal cual:
Me gustaría que absolutamente nadie de los presentes tuviera una idea errónea acerca de las intenciones y resultados de la primera película americana de Tommy Wirkola: es un film que, por comparación, convierte a Abraham Lincoln: Cazador de Vampiros en una entrada pulcra y aséptica entrada de la Enciclopedia Británica sobre el histórico presidente. El nivel de furia visual, desvergüenza estética y delirio argumental de esta adaptación chiflada del cuento infantil es tal que, como muy adecuadamente la definió nuestro amigo y maestro Noel Ceballos, «estallan más cabezas durante sus 86 minutos que durante todo el cine de 2012». Hansel & Gretel: Cazadores de Brujas es, pues, un divertimento extremadamente violento y macabro, en el…
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It's a film titled Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters...
Most of the running time of Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters I was in awe of what I was seeing. Then I remembered this was 2013, and this has become the norm.
The "plot" moves incredibly fast and rarely takes an opportunity to breathe. This would be okay if it looked like the cast was having fun (Similar to how it worked for Joe Carnahan's The A-Team), but neither of the leads, or even the supporting cast look like they're having a lot of fun, and thus, none of the fun the filmmakers want it to have really translates.
Hansel & Gretel isn't boring, but it was a waste of my time…
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This shouldn't exist.
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This is an insipid attempt to blend different genres. Its inconsistency with being a film that pokes fun at medieval times movies while also trying to be a straight-up fairytale became a major factor that took me out of the film. None of these actors are really given a whole lot to do. There are some mildly fun moments of witch-hunting as well as impressive prosthetics, but the film is too confused and doesn't push the boundaries enough in terms of gore and etc. for me to give it a recommendation.
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Some classic fairy tales should just not be touched, let alone made into a movie. This film follows the life of Hansel & Gretel many years after they killed the witch in the candy house as children. Now adults, they have grown up and are professional witch hunters. Pretty ridiculous, heh? I guess wirter/director Tommy Wirkola was inspired after seeing Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. Well that is actually an insult to Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Slayer, which I actually liked. As ridiculous as the concept was for that movie, the writing, acting, and directing was actually good. This film however falls very flat.
Let's ignore the fact that the Brothers Grimm wrote and published this tale in 1812, and let's forget that…
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.......... que decir de esta película...., no me gusto para nada la deje de ver al minuto 25. Muy mala pelicula para mi gusto, maquillaje pésimo, historia pésima, ni ver a Gemma Artenton en patalla que cautivo.
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Yes it's silly and yes it's surprisingly quite gory but that doesn't take away from the fact that it's just fun (and funny), something Snow White & the Huntsman severely lacked. Much like critics' boner for Avatar but distaste for John Carter, I don't think I'll ever understand why is apparently clearly better than the other. Oh well.
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A generally flat and lackluster entry in the modern focus-group-smushed fairy-tale reinvention genre, HANSEL & GRETEL: WITCH HUNTERS only elicits a reaction when it's being all awkward about curse words, which it doles out liberally in the most stilted way possible. This movie could easily have been just as unremarkable as a PG-13 movie, but writer-director Tommy Wirkola (DEAD SNOW) seems tentatively fascinated with random f-bombs, which cost the film an R-rating and never once add a single thing to the proceedings. It feels like they were deployed to try and dredge up some faux-modern grit or attitude or something, but it's a sheltered-religious-kid's-first-day-at-college sort of cursing, and it never for one second stops being hilariously ill-conceived.
Of course, I spent…
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The kids grew up to be kickass witch hunters. It earns R rating. Very fun movie
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Not really bad but mediocre. Blood and violence are too prominent to care for the story (not important anyway), despite nice cast, working well together.
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Generation AWSOM nerdery at its absolute worst. I did have some fun with Peter Stormare and Famke Janssen's gleeful overacting, and with Bjørn Sundquist speaking English.
Suggested themes for a more thorough review:
1. Is there really any difference between video games and films like this, these days? You know, except the pesky interactive parts in games.
2. Casual misogony in mainstream trash culture.
3. Tommy Wirkola: worst sense of humour in the world, or worst sense of humour in the world? -
This is very fun movie. Of course, I was familiar with the original fairy tail, as so are you, probably. It's typical fairy tail. Now, forget everything you knew and Hansel and Gretel fairy tail and be prepared to be blown away. This movie is made for people older than 18, hell, even 21 :)
And I say that in best possible way. This movie isn't afraid of blood and gore. It has all those things. It doesn't watch the language. It's pure enjoyment.
That isn't necessarily dark. This movie is actually very funny and fun. Scenes where main characters throw one-liners are excellent.
Overall, if you'd like a fun movie that's a fantasy, this one's for you. Just make sure you don't watch it with someone who's young as they'll have nightmares for years ;)
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I saw this movie a few weeks ago basically just because it has a scene in it which was filmed in my hometown. Apparently, the film's pretty good. The story actually was pretty good (it's an action film so don't expect too much), but the brilliant action scenes (which were pretty brutal) and effects where what made the film really worth seeing. The 3D wasn't really worth its money, it was used for these things-almost-fly-at-the-audience-experience, but the movie wouldn't be worse if you watched it in 2D. All in all it was typical action popcorn cinema and worth its money.
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Really, when did this ever seem like a good idea. How is it possible to completely screw every modern interpretation of a classic fairy tale. Well done for keeping with the trend.