These are films reviewed on the cult movie podcast Junk Food Dinner ( www.junkfooddinner.com/ ).
Nude Nuns With Big Guns
This sister is one bad mother!
Upon taking her vows to become a nun, Sister Sarah is abused, brainwashed and drugged into submission by the corrupt clergy. On the verge of death from a lethal dose of drugs, Sister Sarah receives a message from GOD telling her to take vengeance on all those who did her wrong. Armed with God's will and an arsenal of big guns, she dispenses Judgment Day on her former tormentors. When the church hires the merciless motorcycle gang the "Los Muertos" to track down and kill her they soon realize that this SISTER IS ONE BAD MOTHER.
Not as fucking awesome as the title suggests.
"I'm gonna nail you harder than they nailed Jesus to the cross."
Watching this film is like watching some cheap knock-off of a Robert Rodriguez movie. It had the feel of one, but none of the charm.
I also have to admit, I was a little disappointed in the title. Sure there were plenty of nude nuns in this film and there were nuns with big guns, but I don't ever recall both at the same time (except one very briefly at the end).
Having said that though, this was definitely a fun watch for a mindless action/titty movie. If you've got nothing better to do on a Sunday morning, why not spend it watching a nun movie?
Finals week has made me do terrible things
Whilst the film delivers the nude nuns and big guns of its evocative title there is a distinct lack of fun to be had in this exploitation flick. Instead it is a sleazy, but never shocking, procession of bare breasts, poorly choreographed sequences of bloody vengeance and the obligatory scenes of lesbian sex.
The film fails to tell a compelling story, throwing too many forgettable characters into the mix, and relying solely on the title to attract an audience. Only David Castro as the leader of a biker gang seems to realise he is in a silly exploitation movie and has a bit of fun with his exaggerated performance. There have been a lot of bad modern exploitation flicks and Nude Nuns with Big Guns is another to add to the list.
Movie 3 of the Evening of Bad Taste:
After the two Japanese splatter movies we went for the most downloaded movie in history...Nude Nuns with Big Guns (you may guess why it is one of the most downloaded movies...)
For me it was the second viewing of this nunsploitation grindhouse revenge flick, and yes it still remains bad but in a good way. Viewing it together with a couple of beers we had a lot of fun with this.
Clearly the scriptwriters needed to get something off their chest or either they simply don't like nuns.
Yet again the horror channel owes me 2 hrs of my life back!
Still better than The Fountain.
The film revels in cruelty, and is not ridiculous or cartoonish enough to take the edge off. Playing this material straight-faced is a serious misstep, one that makes the film difficult to sit through. None of this is much of a surprise considering Guzman’s previous (and debut) feature was the even nastier low-budget rape-revenge flick "Run! Bitch Run!." If there’s anything to be said for "Nude Nuns with Big Guns," it’s that it is a definite step up technically from that film. Not that even that is saying much, given "Run! Bitch Run!" is an ugly, barely competent shot-on-video feature. Guzman reuses some lines from that film in this one, which makes sense given that virtually everything else in the…
Cherry Popper Bar, The Bitch's No Tell Motel, Titty Flicker theater, Uma Thurnam, Lucky room number seven...
Gimme the sequel goddammit!
Q: What if instead of all those Tarantino ripoffs we had to deal with in the 90's we got a Robert Rodriguez ripoff in 2010?
A: This movie makes you really appreciate Boondock Saints.
The pinnacle of nunsploitation in film. Hilarious, fantastic, a bit slow at times. Hopefully, Sister Magpie from Re-Loaded will be in the sequel.
Modern movies with gimmick titles never, ever live up to them.
The Catholic church can't catch a break these days. Their credibility is so shot that everyone's wondering if there's some sinister hidden reason for why Pope Benedict XVI just gave his two-weeks notice (he's the first pope to quit the job since the year 489 B.C.). He says that his health isn't good, but John Paul II wasn't exactly Jack Lalanne and he managed to stay Pope right up to the end. I can't think of a more fragile-looking human than him. For the past ten years of his life, old John Paul II looked like a lowercase letter "r" with a hat. He looked like a strong wind might kill him. You can never be too old and sick…
Le tette al vento che Nude Nuns with Big Guns offre ad ogni inquadratura aiutano, ma fra sentirsi sporchi e cattivi e esserlo c'è un abisso.
This is a review from an old blog I used to write for, I want all my reviews in one place on Letterboxd!
Things sure have started to slow down here on The Movie Goer so its time to turn around my lackluster attempt to be a film critic and give everyone a glimpse at a seriously awesome little flick I was fortunate to see (it was the world premier even!) at the Arizona Underground Film Festival last year. I mentioned in a previous post about the film festival that Nude Nuns was one of the most bad-ass films I have seen on the big screen and after watching it a second time I still stand my ground and would…
A list with film titles that could easily have been titles of porn movies.
Got any more?
A Letterboxd community poll (though I post these in Facebook cinema discussion groups as well, so if anyone in those…