With so many reviews on the site now it is easy to miss the good ones so I thought a…
Twice the Teeth. Twice the Terror.
After the events at Lake Victoria, the prehistoric school of blood-thirsty piranhas make their way into swimming pools, plumbing, and a newly opened water park.
Is it a bird??
Is it a plane??
It's Moron Man, who against better judgement and a ton of bad reviews still decided to watch his crap!
A quick summary:
Shot of gnarling and yapping fish
Dying generic teenagers
Yapping fish swimming by (which actually look faker than most of the boobs)
The Hoff (who plays himself. Badly.)
People I don't give a fuck about that are dying
The scariest bit of this film: A hint towards a sequel....
I'd like to close with a quote from the film that sums up nicely what level it sinks to:
'Josh cut off his penis because something came out of my vagina.'
”Josh cut off his penis because something came out of my vagina.”
I’m surprised this film has taken such a critical beating when it achieves its (admittedly very low) aspirations. It is obviously a bad film but as a schlocky B-movie it was always intended to be bad but by those standards it just about delivers the required T&A, bloody set pieces and pointless celebrity cameos to make it relatively engaging. In fact I enjoyed it a hell of a lot more than the rather boring first film.
It is a film that certainly plays up to convention with lots of knowing winks along the way. If anything the films major fault is that it isn’t as funny or knowing…
One look at my ratings will show that I do not have much low rated films.
This is not because of perhaps me giving films higher ratings than I should.
It is because I try my hardest to skip over films that are considered bad/stupid etc.
There are so many classics and great films I have not seen, I try to limit myself to watching only interesting films, films by directors I like and films that are considered at least good.
Why am I saying this? Becuase I also try to reserve half a star rating to films that are seriously the lowest films made.
Even if a film has at least some good scense I will try and give…
Welcome to rock bottom.
The first thing most people seem to ask is "Well did you even like the first one?" and the answer is yes, in fact I loved the 2010 remake a great deal. It was fun, had great gross-out gags, self-aware enough to be funny and walked that fine line that some horror/comedies have a hard time to find.
I didn't find this one much fun at all. It's almost as if the casting director went out of her way to find worst actors then the first film. Admittedly the first one surprisingly had the great Elisabeth Shue in it, but even the supporting cast of mostly unknown actors came off as competent for the…
I did actually quite like this film for a few reasons.
Whilst it is epically crap in most places and largely unrealistic this it what makes it. The film was never made to be an Attenborough documentary. It is a giant piss take of a genre and itself. Its like all the Scary Movie films, with fish, in water, but good.
Oh and any film with that many women showing of their spam purse is always going to get a couple of stars.
Best bits have to be the Hoff. He was genius for the 10 mins he was in it for.
Josh cut off his penis because something came out of my vagina.
Boobies and Butts and Crotch Shots, Oh My!
They must be holding off on the 'use a piranha as a dildo' gag until the next flick.
Completely pointless carbon-copy of the first film. Makes the first film look like a classic in comparison.
This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Josh: What the fuck is on my dick?
The first Piranha 3D was bad in a good way, with a wink to the audience. This one is bad in a terrible way, laughing at its own jokes and saying "Isn't this great?!" No, it's not. This is Sharknado without the kitsch. Terrible!
Booooooooooobs. And there was an excuse movie to go with it.
Yeah, it's awful. And actually has less tits & gore than the first one. So much for upping the ante.
laugh out loud. so bad. but better then the original piranha sequel. tho to be honest i did miss the flying piranhas from the spawning they were hilarious.
Probablemente lo más frustrante de esta secuela sea que aún teniendo como director y guionistas a los responsables de la trilogía "Feast" (John Gulager, Patrick Melton y Marcus Dunstan) el resultado sea tan pobre y tan claramente inferior al muy divertido remake de Alexandre Aja. De hecho, entre los escasos efectos gore y las pirañas de CGI barato creo que se acerca más a los telefilmes cutres de la SyFy que a una película de verdad. Tiene algunos momentos buenos en cuanto a humor y famosos crepusculares parodiándose a sí mismos, pero en general es una película demasiado modesta y vulgarmente infantil incluso teniendo en cuenta sus intenciones.
Even the Hoff could not make this movie better than the previous one.
- Leon: The Professional
- Freeway II: Confessions of a Trickbaby
- Grave of the Fireflies
- Whisper of the Heart
- Night of the Living Dead
- Night of the Living Dead
- Dawn of the Dead
- Dawn of the Dead
- Day of the Dead
Horror movies are by far my favorite, so I've decided to make a list with all of them I remember…
- Humanoids from the Deep
- The Host
- Shock Waves
- Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan
Boat/Lake/Ocean/River/Ship/Submarine/Swamp Based Horror Films. Adding to my collection of "Horror Film Locations" lists, you can find more horror films sorted…