Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
Live Forever Or Die Trying.
Captain Jack Sparrow crosses paths with a woman from his past, and he's not sure if it's love -- or if she's a ruthless con artist who's using him to find the fabled Fountain of Youth. When she forces him aboard the Queen Anne's Revenge, the ship of the formidable pirate Blackbeard, Jack finds himself on an unexpected adventure in which he doesn't know who to fear more: Blackbeard or the woman from his past.
Terribly written, poorly directed & shoddily performed, the fourth instalment in the Pirates of the Caribbean series is an insipid, pathetic & horribly executed chapter that takes whatever right was left about the original trilogy and brings it to an absolute low for this movie is not only the weakest film of the franchise but also one of the worst films ever made.
A stand-alone sequel to the previous three movies, the story of Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides finds Captain Jack Sparrow embarking on a new journey to find the fabled Fountain of Youth but on his way comes across a woman from his past who's the daughter of the feared pirate, Blackbeard, and discovers that they are also…
I see people rating this over Verbinski's sequels. A lot.
Granted, Penélope Cruz is more gorgeous to see than Keira an infinite number of times. They took Orlando Bloom out of the context and made Depp and Rush come back again. Still, somehow, the film manages to be a total bore, saved for some old-Hollywood-style swashbuckling action more predominant than the previous multimillionaire and intense PG-13 CGIed action shown in the previous installments and Jack Sparrow's character, who still remains an unequalled irreverent character thanks to Depp's unique (and bizarre) acting talents. Moreover, lack of unpopular characters has never made an entire movie better.
This entry now makes Rob Marshall an official entry into my "Most Boring Directors Working Today" book (yes, that includes that particularly overrated musical of 2002, so I apologize for the fans).
I love it when Penélope Cruz curses in Spanish.
So I bought this car. It was pretty flash back in 2003, fast and fun to drive. It took some unexpected corners and was a surprising thrillful ride that I really enjoyed.
After a few years I got the new model thinking it would give me the same buzz, but it didn't. It felt overcomplicated, like the designers had too many ideas and had crammed in too much cleverness into what should be a simple concept car, getting me from A to B with the minimum fuss but with a lot of excitement. And when the 3series model came out, the designers were clearly prescribing to me their version of fun, which seemed to involve a lot of peripherals which…
the last one, bloated and utterly indecipherable though it may have been, was directed by Gore Verbinski, so it also had a pirate ship blown literally to splinters in ultra slow motion and a sword fight between Sparrow and a squid-man on the mast of a ship spiraling into a whirlpool in the middle of a naval battle in the middle of a hurricane as the camera flew around it in circles. this has Rob Marshall's rote coverage and the swelling tones of Hans Zimmer accompanying Sparrow pulling a heavy rope or standing on the roof of a moving carriage. it looks like that old Nickelodeon game show "Legends of the Hidden Temple". i'm not even sure the characters in this actually know or care what they're doing.
When I first saw this film back in 2011 I was more than a little disappointed. We had no Keira, no Orlando, and no Gore Verbinski. The fact that they threw Penelope Cruz into the mix did excite me and with mermaids and the Fountain Of Youth as the new object of everyone's desire, this should have been another fun filled adventure. So what went wrong?
At World's End had felt bloated amid all the CGI as Disney attempted yet again to empty every parents pockets. Some of it worked, a lot of it didn't. Rob Marshall's film however struggles from the very start. The script which always gave Johnny Depp the chance to shine, was pedestrian and lacking in…
I didn't think it would be possible to make a film as tedious as the last Pirates of the Caribbean but new director Rob Marshall has managed it. I guess it shouldn't have come as too much of a shock seeing as Marshall hasn't managed to make a decent film yet but I was at least hoping the absence of Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley would have improved things. Sadly, On Stranger Tides still suffers from the same problems, namely a bloated and uninteresting story, too much Jack Sparrow and supporting characters not up to the job. Even though the film starts with a flurry of activity it still can't help but be terminally dull. The action has little consequence…
Imagine you put the first three Pirates of the Caribbean movies in a strainer. It drains the fun, the comedy, and the overall substance found in the first three, then what remains is poured into a mixing bowl that gets baked into the fourth movie, On Stranger Tides. Let me explain my weird analogy.
This movie makes me question every character's decisions. Not their moral decisions or anything (this movie is too shallow for that), but their overall choices; I find myself saying "Why are they doing this? This is pointless." far too many times. They do unimportant things that make the movie drag on. Regarding fun and comedy, there is next to none. In the first three, fun comes…
Besides Johnny's Captain Jack, Hans Zimmer's music, and Penelope Cruz's hotness, this is quite a chore to sit through.
Mane, f*** this movie, mane
I watched this out of an enjoyment for the trilogy, and in the hope for a future great Javier Bardem performance, but jeepers this is so dull its just stuff happening. Just stuff that keeps happening and doesn't matter.
I can't say I wasn't having fun here and there, but this movie is so damn convoluted with its reasoning and motives that it just felt like a mess of bullshit happenstances leading to an unsatisfactory ending. Very little is explained, and what is explained still doesn't make much sense. It's never clear how people know what they know or why they know what they know or whether or not they actually know what they know. It's weird. And even in the end the writers seem to agree the whole thing is bullshit with the whole 'ship in the bottle' thing requiring a ritual with a goat and someone waggling their fingers. I never knew who to root for, either.…
"If I don't kill a man now and then, they will forget who I am"
The least movie in the franchise...But still highly entertaining action/adventure movie.
The best movie in this series imo
Scavenger Hunt 18
Film #29/Task #20: "A fourquel"
If you liked the first three PotC movies, but didn't care for all of those pesky Will and Elizabeth scenes, don't like character development, and want 100% more Capt. Jack Sparrow nonsense with absolutely no consequences, then this is the movie for you. It's pretty much one long Jack Sparrow solo movie, where Jack, his crew (which is basically just poor Gibbs at this point), and his long-lost ex Angelica must journey to find another mystical something-or-other - this time it's the famous Fountain of Youth - while avoiding the wrath of Blackbeard. Along the way they encounter zombies, mermaids, evil ropes, and... honestly, everything's made up and the plot points don't…
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