With the announcement of the line-up for the 2013 FrightFest Halloween All-nighter, I thought it was about time there was…
See No Evil
This summer. Evil gets raw.
A group of delinquents are sent to clean the Blackwell Hotel. Little do they know reclusive psychopath Jacob Goodnight (Jacobs) has holed away in the rotting hotel. When one of the teens is captured, those who remain -- a group that includes the cop who put a bullet in Goodnight's head four years ago -- band together to survive against the brutal killer.
A group of young delinquents are sent to clean up a dilapidated hotel when they get more than they bargained for in the shape of muscle-bound killer with an eye fetish. Produced by WWE Studios and featuring one of their own lumbering wrestlers, Glenn Jacobs (more commonly known as Kane), See No Evil is an uninspired slasher film populated by cardboard cutout characters and a serious lack of decent kills.
The film utilises a stock grimy aesthetic that has been used by every half-arsed DTV horror film of the past ten years. I assume it is supposed to look dark and creepy but it mainly just looks cheap and lazy. Beyond the novelty of seeing a wrestler butcher a group…
“Look into their eyes, can't you see the sin?”
-Margaret (Cecily Polson)
Once a good number of years ago a girl I knew told me one of her favourite horror movies was ‘See No Evil’. Now at that point in time I hadn’t heard of the 2006 horror film starring notorious WWF wrestler Glenn ‘Kane’ Jacobs, so I assumed that she was referring to the 1989 comedy film, See No Evil, Hear No Evil starring Gene Wilder and Richard Pryor; I thought it best not to flag up her error. Now though I see it was I that made the rather foolish mistake. In hindsight, all I can say is that she had horrible taste in horror movies (no offence…
This movie's well-worn territory and it looks like they snuck onto the set of Saw 2 at night to film it, but Kane is a menacing slasher and Gregory Dark makes everything super gross and slimy and dirty and gory, so it's pretty cool as far as late-era slashers go.
See No Evil feels like a mid-2000s WWF film because it is a mid-2000s WWF film. It is gloomy, dirty and over-stylised garbage that does nothing new, interesting or exciting. No matter how much gore the film throws at you or how many annoying teens get butchered, you'll yawn your way through this uninspired slasher. That finale is pretty cool though, Kane is put through hell in that gruesome effects-filled finale - it also made everything before it worth it.
I hope the Soska sisters can do something cool with this character in the sequel.
I had no intention of watching See No Evil.
Not that I am too much of a snob to watch a WWE film, I loved The Condemned, it's just that I only watch films starring wrestlers I find (well, FOUND upto about 2004 when I stopped caring) interesting. I basically lumped Kane in with dull meat sacks like Big Show and John Cena.
But then the WWE went mad and gave the Soska twins the sequel.
Still I didn't much care.
Then they cast Chelan Simmons...and then Katharine Isabelle.
So with a future Day 1 Bluray purchase of See No Evil 2 already budgeted for, I needed to familiarise myself with the original.
Sadly...it's a bit of a turd.
Believe it or not, See No Evil gave me hope for WWE Studios. Not because it's any good, because it's not really, it has all the same problems all underwhelming modern Horror movies have, from the underwritten, unlikable characters to the trying-too-hard, everything-looks-a-bit-grimy artificial dirtiness that the Platinum Dunes remakes made popular. But it's not UNIQUELY awful, either. There are no moments of stunning badness that cause your jaw to hit the floor. There are even some GOOD points- some of the gore effects are quite good, there's one effective death scene involving a pack of dogs (that rather maturely leaves a lot to your imagination), and Glen "Kane" Jacobs is actually really good as the killer. In a better…
"This is not what God wants!"
Has some decent gore, but other than that it is as bad as the wrestling angle related to it. I wish they would have kept the name Eye Scream Man. Or made the villain an evil dentist. The best part is that none of these bad teens know how to clean at all.
Don't know why it took me almost 10 years to see this movie. It wasn't incredibly special, but it was fun. It was creepy at times. There were some pretty cool death scenes. It's your basic slice and dice popcorn flick. Have fun with it!
"When I said you can do better than her, I didn't mean this much better."
I went into this movie with absolutely no knowledge except that I knew Kane was the main star (obviously). While most of the actors and actress featured in this film have faded into obscurity by now (no thanks to this movie), I was pleasantly surprised to actually recognize the majority of the cast in this. Sadly, it didn't get any better from there. The movie was weak and weird. While weird could be taken for a good thing in most cases in horror movies nowadays, it just doesn't work well here. A lot of the acting is weak. Though I will give them all a…
Took every rule of your standard slasher formula and broke them in the worst ways possible. There was even the opportunity for Kane to deliver a crushing double choke slam, and they botched that too.
From my old Netflix reviews:
The only reason I even bothered to see this one was only because I like Kane, aka Glen Jacobs and I used to be a huge WWE (WWF) mark back in the day. He's a natural as a slasher villain, but the weak story doesn't do him any favors. It's a standard, by-the-numbers slasher flick with bad acting but a sharp visual aesthetic to it.
Very generic, not horrible just blah. Everything was by the numbers no surprises, no good acting, and the last scene with the dogs wasn't funny it only made the whole thing worse.
My review -- this film is now on DVD and this film made a profit of just over $10 million at the box office. To be honest this project is not really of the horror genre it is more into gorography, which makes my volunteer film critic job, incredibly difficult, simply because I do not mind any genre but I have to say this genre is very difficult for me to condone and support just based on the fact that See No Evil has been done with no artistic nature be it normal artistic or alternative artistic temperament whatsoever and plus the religious aspect, I couldn't and will not condone any film that is this extremely graphic. Because for two…
As much as I really didn't care to see this one, I figured I need to before seeing the sequel. Not terrible but definitely not worth seeing. Typical.
The wrist bit and the ending are the only 2 reasons to watch this.
- Ed Gein
- Freeway II: Confessions of a Trickbaby
- Dario Argento's Phantom of the Opera
- Christina's House
- Salem's Lot
- 100 Feet
Horror movies I've seen. List copied from my IMDB account. It will keep expanding.
In no particular order.
- The Haunted Castle
- The Bewitched Inn
- The X-Ray Fiend
- The Devil in a Convent
- Faust and Marguerite
Contains every horror film made that is not lost and is found on the letterboxd database.
If there is any…