Every film that has ever been nominated for an Academy Award in any category. Enjoy!
Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones
A Jedi Shall Not Know Anger. Nor Hatred. Nor Love.
(22 Years Before Episode IV) Ten years after the events of the Battle of Naboo, the galaxy has undergone significant changes. Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi are assigned to protect Padmé from political separatists. As relationships form and powerful forces collide, these heroes face choices that will impact the destiny of the Republic.
That little green fella from the Vodafone ads must be desperate for money to appear in this shit.
'Suck very much, it does, yes?'
-Bubba, Yoda's cooler, older brother
I had great hopes for Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones after the let down of Episode I. I thought that it would get better but it ended up being even worse.
I was expecting to see how Anakin Skywalker developed his training and how he finally became a Jedi. I guess that would have been interesting to see. George Lucas was more concerned about creating one of the worst love stories in cinema! Anakin and Padmé's love story seems so forced! Their scenes together were supposed to be romantic but in fact they bored me a lot. Also their dialogues, well all dialogues in the film are absolutely terrible!
Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman had no chemistry!…
Your clones are very impressive. You must be very proud.
I'm sure I kinda liked this movie the first time I saw it. At least that's my recollection. It's biggest problem is without a doubt the so-called love story between Anakin and Padmé. Their scenes together are cringe inducing. These two people don't even look like they enjoy being in the same room together. The fact that Hayden Christensen comes off as incredibly creepy during these scenes just makes it all the more unbelievable when they finally do "fall in love".
The film is also filled with scenes and imagery that have a sole purpose of making you think of the original trilogy. Some of them have no logic…
"I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth."
Oh, fuck off Hayden Christensen!
The cinematic equivalent of walking through mud on a wet, cold, horrible day.
This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Obi-Wan jumping through a skyscraper window to apprehend an escaping assassin droid is probably the closest a jedi comes to badass in the Star Wars prequels. An improvement on Episode I in terms of narrative focus (in certain sequences), Episode II nevertheless continues the prequel tradition of hammy (with ham water and an extra helping of ham) dialogue, nonsensical twists of galactic intrigue and painfully stilted acting from the protagonist. Having heard that people mildly enjoyed the pod race from Episode I, Lucas decided to sprinkle Episode II with a host of action set pieces which do absolutely nothing for the story (at least the climactic battles in The Phantom Menace had a comprehensible impact on the Star Wars myth…
Well I thought this was pretty bad the first few (yes repeat offender) times I watched it, but after 80 or so episodes of The Clone Wars TV series, it really gives you a new perspective in that this movie (and really I-III all together) is truly an inferior product to everything else Star Wars. Aside from its many faults, the acting alone in the CARTOON TV SHOW is a million-times better than this shite. Five stars for Yoda on crack. Minus three stars for the first 2 hrs or so.
Second part of the yearly Star Wars rewatch.
Three years after the trainwreck that was Episode I, George thought it was best to release Attack Of The Clones. Civil war between a republic and some far away planets who are building a robot army. Trade Federation anyone ? *sigh*
Luckily Obi-Wan stumbles upon a bounty hunter who leads him to a far away planet (yup, another one) where an alien race is building a clone army for the republic. Strangely enough no one seems to know about this. That's probably what you get with a huge administration. *sigh*
Gone is the menacing Darth Maul, replaced by a senior citizen with a curved light sabre. Cool actor but come on ...…
The worst Star Wars film, but you need to see it if you enjoy the others.
I find most of the 'acting' in this offensive but again, like Han Solo, it has it's moments!
Kiddo pick for movie night. The vision Lucas had for the prequels finally starts to come together. It isn't good, but it's better than PHANTOM MENACE and the last act is solid so at least there is some kind of payoff for viewers. Christopher Lee and Ewan McGregor clearly own their characters while everyone else is still trying to figure out who and what they are thanks to more clumsy direction by George Lucas.
Worth noting, as much as I hate the prequels, my son's generation LOVES these films. I have yet to run in to a kid who has zero interest in the prequels and the worlds they created or expanded upon.
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