In which Wizards Battle Each Other. Suggestions Welcome as I am going to forget now all of the wizard battle…
Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones
A Jedi Shall Not Know Anger. Nor Hatred. Nor Love.
Ten years after the invasion of Naboo, the galaxy is on the brink of civil war. Under the leadership of a renegade Jedi named Count Dooku, thousands of solar systems threaten to break away from the Galactic Republic. When an assassination attempt is made on Senator Padmé Amidala, the former Queen of Naboo, twenty-year-old Jedi apprentice Anakin Skywalker is assigned to protect her. In the course of his mission, Anakin discovers his love for Padmé as well as his own darker side. Soon, Anakin, Padmé, and Obi-Wan Kenobi are drawn into the heart of the Separatist movement and the beginning of the Clone Wars.
obi-wan: the planet is supposed to be right here but it's not, can you get the children to help me find it
yoda: dude it's right there
obi-wan: oh yeah
Caught this on TV in France when I was on vacation a couple years ago, and even though I could hardly understand a word of the dubbed version, I was enraptured by its images and its miraculous sense of sound design (those Seismic Charges tho). Watching it with the dialogue intact is frustrating, especially because Lucas' vision is so grand and ambitious. It's like watching a child trying to put a puzzle together. You want to help them along the way, but it is essential that the child works through it on their own. The uneasiness comes from the idea that they'll never solve the puzzle.
That little green fella from the Vodafone ads must be desperate for money to appear in this shit.
Don't let Jar-Jar Lloyd fever cloud your mind; this is the worst Star Wars in a walk. It's every bit the simpleton kids tale as the first, but now it's dressed up in guise of a movie meant for grown-ups (or whatever passes for grown-up among die-hards). This leads to love scenes that sound like they were written by an 11-year-old and an emphasis on action that makes up for the relative dearth of it in the last film by just throwing as much shit as possible into the frame, nearly all of it animated so that the few genuine, living people in a shot are really just waving sticks about.
Speaking of the animation, the combination of flat animation…
'Suck very much, it does, yes?'
-Bubba, Yoda's cooler, older brother
The fifth instalment in the Star Wars saga and the second chapter in George Lucas' prequel trilogy, Star Wars: Episode II – Attack of the Clones has all the ingredients that made The Phantom Menace such a repugnant piece of shit and although it offers no improvement over its pathetic dialogues, wooden characters, lacklustre performances & lame attempts at humour, it does manage to be minutely less unbearable than its predecessor.
Set 10 years after the events of The Phantom Menace in a galaxy far, far away, Attack of the Clones finds the galaxy on the brink of a civil war and follows Anakin Skywalker who's now put in charge of taking care of the Senator he happens to have a…
La parte detectivesca de Obi Wan está realmente bien! lástima que no haya más de eso. Lo peor sin duda el cambio de Anakin, es demasiado brusco, una pena que por supuesto no podian esperar a que creciera el del Episodio I, porque vaya tela con Anakin Tontín... es un cambio al oscuro demasiado brusco.
Y lo peor aún estaba por llegar...
Isn't the point of this trilogy meant to be that Anakin Skywalker wasn't always so bad? That's meant to be the gist of the story, right? I mean, for years now, I've just sort of accepted the narrative that before losing himself to the dark side, Anakin was a semi-decent guy at least. That's what I expected to see. Instead, The Phantom Menace shoved an annoying 9 year old in my face for two hours, and Attack of the Clones offers this thoroughly unlikable dickhead? I don't get it. He has absolutely no redeeming qualities. He's so clearly power-hungry, petulant, single-minded, self-centred and fascist-leaning that it's like, "Well, fucking duh. Of course that guy was going to become a Sith." I literally hate him more in this than I do as Darth Vader. I'm so frustrated by the idea that Padme would actually be interested in him when there's a young, hot Ewan McGregor right there.
Friend I watched it with: "I bet Count Dooku was a fuckboy"
The romance plot is truly awful. Horrendous. Watching paint-dry would be more entertaining.
Thankfully, there's an okay plot with the Fetts and the clones that come in at the end to try and patch together a shambolic film.
i wrote an essay on attack of the clones for my film studies class and my teacher went out and hired it after reading it
watching paint dry is better than this
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Remember when Jar Jar Binks stepped in shit in the last movie? Turns out he stepped on Attacks Of the Clones.
This movie in my opinion is the worst of the franchise. The acting didnt improve and the new sith bad guy wasnt fun. Like always i will examine the worst the film has to offer.
WHAT THEY DID BAD:
All major stars returned to do this film. Sounds like a big plus with the names this movie has. Samuel L Jackson, Natalie Portman, and Ewan McGregor return to their roles from the first film. Only the latter gives a solid enough performance. Hell, they even got Christopher Lee to play Count Dooku.
Who is Christopher Lee you may ask?…
And of course, when I just had told everyone that I haven't really liked Star Wars so far, along came a part that I actually liked! Now they deepened the characters a bit and this time I wasn't bored at all, it was interesting to follow the story (except for the beginning where they chase an assassin). Well OK, the writing and actors were still clumsy but now I felt a true adventure feeling and the world felt real, huge and exciting. So that's a clear improvement.
Marginalmente superior a La Amenaza Fantasma, acá al menos George Lucas recuerda qué es dirigir una película, aunque su tendencia a dirigir un videojuego le termina ganando. Al menos podemos ver a un ridículo Yoda saltando por todos lados para pelear con el Conde Dooku.
For the last three years, I've kept a log of the films I showed my kids as they were introduced…
Every film that has ever been nominated for an Academy Award in any category. Enjoy!