These are films reviewed on the cult movie podcast Junk Food Dinner ( www.junkfooddinner.com/ ).
A galactic adventure beyond your wildest dreams!
A pair of smugglers manage to pick up a castaway while running from the authorities, who turns out to be the only survivor from a secret mission to destroy a mysterious superweapon designed by the evil Count Zartharn. The smugglers are soon recruited by the Emperor to complete the mission, as well as to rescue the Emperor's son, who has gone missing.
But also, in its own way, five stars.
If movie screens could dream, Starcrash is what the dream would look and sound like. No attempt to hide artifice, instead a headfirst dive into pulp serial lala land. A genre kaleidoscope, a sci-fi lava lamp, gorgeous people giving fractured performances, weird looking people giving weird performances, and various other analog magicks. Only an Italian could lack the self-consciousness to make something so silly and pure. In space, no one can hear you dream.
"So you see into the future. All these years you never told me. Think of all the trouble I might have avoided." she tried to exclaim, apparently struggling to communicate her astonishment from behind her dull, expressionless face.
"You would have tried to change the future, which is against the law, so therefore I can tell you nothing," he said, immediately after using his sight into the future to change the future, breaking the law and telling us nothing.
Starcrash is just ridiculous. That's the only thing it is.
It’s impossible to evaluate as a movie by any traditional criteria: the dialogue is laughable, the performances are flat, the plot is contrived in every imaginable way, there's no narrative throughline,…
A cheap Star Wars knock-off with a dash of Barbarella, Starcrash is by most measures a complete piece of shit. The special effects are awful, the acting is grating, and the dialog is perplexing at best. But the filmmakers did some things to make the whole train wreck entirely enjoyable.
1) The whole thing moves super fast. Whatever the plot was, it required the heroine to visit a handful of planets, which meant there was a new setting every few minutes and little time to get bored.
2) There was a ton of special effects. Yeah, they were mostly terrible (which I found to be pretty charming), but the shear amount of effects work that went into this turd is…
After watching Maniac I had no idea where to go. How do you follow Maniac? It was so weird/gnarly/awesome/crazy for me to even think of what I might be in the mood for next.
Then while I was watching some of the bonus interviews on the Blu ray I realized that Caroline Munro and Joe Spinell actually met a year or two before when they made Starcrash...so that was the push I needed to finally watch Starcrash.
It went above and beyond all of my expectations and now sits comfortably in my mental list of favorite science fiction flicks.
It's not subtle with it's Star Wars "influences" although the plot isn't very Star Wars-ish. It opens up with a underneath…
If the spectrum of bad movies ranges from offensively inept and unwatchable to unmistakably lousy but somehow fun, "Starcrash" falls closer to the latter. Pilfering liberally from "Star Wars," "Flash Gordon," and any number of Ray Harryhausen effects spectacles, the Italian/American space fantasy with the Roger Corman pedigree is hokey and dubiously made. The ridiculous spectacle, however, bears a certain, almost watchable charm.
The story is a convoluted mishmash of borrowed space fantasy tropes, featuring a galaxy full of robots, monsters, emperors, and princes. Refreshingly, the film's protagonist is a woman, Stella Star, and her adventures see her battling giant space robots and saving David Hasselhoff from a phantom planet.
Though, somehow, John Barry scored the film and Christopher Plummer…
Space opera spectacle from Luigi Cozzi.
Starring the lovely Caroline Munro and featuring the charismatic Joe Spinell, Christopher Plummer and David Hasselhoff.
Lot of things happens in this fun but not very good or well made film. Inspired by a lot of film especially Star Wars it even has one character wielding a lightsaber.
Zardoz, Barbarella and an adaption of The Room in space. That's what this is. Glorious and majestic.
Space scenes are also never repeated, not a single time, nu uh.
More like Christopher Slummer, am I right?
Just kidding, this movie's a thing of beauty.
When a giant gold bullet crashes through the spaceship window and two guys with guns just jump out of it and start shooting up the place?
I will forever profess my love for Luigi Cozzi's deliriously awesome "Star Wars" wanna-be, because this is the flick that intro'd me to the wild, wacky world of Italian/Euro B-Movies/exploitation films when I was just a teen. 30+ years later, it's still a hoot and a sentimental favorite.
Space hottie Stella Star and her faithful, white-boy Afro'd companion Akton must rescue a lost Prince (David freakin' Hasselhoff!!)and save the universe from the evil machinations of Count Zartharn (Booo! Hissss!). Over the top action, bad dialogue and charmingly cheesy special effects ensue.
In short: if you see only one low budget, late '70s Italian sci-fi mish-mosh starring David Hasselhoff this year,make sure it's this one!!
SAW IT AT WEIRD WEDNESDAY AT THE ALAMO DRAFTHOUSE
The weirdest and most famous Italian rip off of star wars. It has a robot that talks like a cowboy. David Hasselfhoff fighting robots. An 3rd act has so many explosions, that it looks like the inside of Michael Bays head
Cheesy and silly , sadly an awful script with terrible exposition dialogue. Not so special effects, highlighted with stop motion.
Less of Star Wars rip-off more of a 'Sinbad in Space' including it very own silver-titted Talos . Everyone in cast gives a horrible performance although Caroline Munro is stunning enough to anyone's mind off that .
If poorly dubbed, low budget, poorly performed and poorly written films that rip off star wars, you've found some gold. I enjoyed every goofy minute of this zany scifi film.
(Viewing Format: 2010 Blu-ray, 1.85:1 HD)
I only recently heard about this Italian "Star Wars" knockoff. But once I heard my beloved Joe Spinell started as the evil Count Zarth Arn, I knew I had to see it. Plus, it also stars Spinell's "Maniac" co-star, Caroline Monroe, as a leather bikini clad smuggler named Stella Star (this ISN'T a porno, I swear), AND we get Christopher Plummer and David Hasselhoff in supporting roles....
Yeah, this movie is great. Do yourself a favor, find it, watch it, enjoy it for everything it is and fails to be. It's easily better than any of the "Star Wars" prequels.
UPDATE 1/27/2016: New removal. This time it's the 1980 mini-series The Martian Chronicles. Don't know why, since I was under…
Aliens, Asteroids, Space, Intergalactic Insanity!