These are films reviewed on the cult movie podcast Junk Food Dinner ( www.junkfooddinner.com/ ).
A galactic adventure beyond your wildest dreams!
A pair of smugglers manage to pick up a castaway while running from the authorities, who turns out to be the only survivor from a secret mission to destroy a mysterious superweapon designed by the evil Count Zartharn. The smugglers are soon recruited by the Emperor to complete the mission, as well as to rescue the Emperor's son, who has gone missing.
But also, in its own way, five stars.
"So you see into the future. All these years you never told me. Think of all the trouble I might have avoided." she tried to exclaim, apparently struggling to communicate her astonishment from behind her dull, expressionless face.
"You would have tried to change the future, which is against the law, so therefore I can tell you nothing," he said, immediately after using his sight into the future to change the future, breaking the law and telling us nothing.
Starcrash is just ridiculous. That's the only thing it is.
It’s impossible to evaluate as a movie by any traditional criteria: the dialogue is laughable, the performances are flat, the plot is contrived in every imaginable way, there's no narrative throughline,…
A cheap Star Wars knock-off with a dash of Barbarella, Starcrash is by most measures a complete piece of shit. The special effects are awful, the acting is grating, and the dialog is perplexing at best. But the filmmakers did some things to make the whole train wreck entirely enjoyable.
1) The whole thing moves super fast. Whatever the plot was, it required the heroine to visit a handful of planets, which meant there was a new setting every few minutes and little time to get bored.
2) There was a ton of special effects. Yeah, they were mostly terrible (which I found to be pretty charming), but the shear amount of effects work that went into this turd is…
After watching Maniac I had no idea where to go. How do you follow Maniac? It was so weird/gnarly/awesome/crazy for me to even think of what I might be in the mood for next.
Then while I was watching some of the bonus interviews on the Blu ray I realized that Caroline Munro and Joe Spinell actually met a year or two before when they made Starcrash...so that was the push I needed to finally watch Starcrash.
It went above and beyond all of my expectations and now sits comfortably in my mental list of favorite science fiction flicks.
It's not subtle with it's Star Wars "influences" although the plot isn't very Star Wars-ish. It opens up with a underneath…
If the spectrum of bad movies ranges from offensively inept and unwatchable to unmistakably lousy but somehow fun, "Starcrash" falls closer to the latter. Pilfering liberally from "Star Wars," "Flash Gordon," and any number of Ray Harryhausen effects spectacles, the Italian/American space fantasy with the Roger Corman pedigree is hokey and dubiously made. The ridiculous spectacle, however, bears a certain, almost watchable charm.
The story is a convoluted mishmash of borrowed space fantasy tropes, featuring a galaxy full of robots, monsters, emperors, and princes. Refreshingly, the film's protagonist is a woman, Stella Star, and her adventures see her battling giant space robots and saving David Hasselhoff from a phantom planet.
Though, somehow, John Barry scored the film and Christopher Plummer…
"Now maybe is a good time to use your ancient system of prayer and hope it works for robots as well."
I cannot in good conscience rate this piece of late 70's schlock any higher, though I wanted so badly to give it 5 stars because:
(And the robot is kind of awesome, too -- he talks just like Iron Hide.)
A terrible movie that makes no sense despite its habit of constantly explaining the plot. Or maybe I simply kept losing interest in the story. For a movie that's so busy, it sure moves slowly.
Still, who can resist it? Ubercheesy dialogue and effects. A villain who almost literally twirls his mustache but is too…
A legendary film within my family. My uncles went to a screening of this back in '78. They were the only people in the theater, save for a drunk guy in the front row. At one point, Christopher Plummer proclaims, "I command time to stop!" The drunk guy in the front row, heard this, and with all his might yelled "WHUUUUUUUUT???"
I finally got to see this movie for myself. In short, it's not good, but boy is it memorable. The robot with the cowboy accent is amazing by itself, but the rest is quite something, in a bad way.
Get a bunch of people together, get some alcohol, get this film, and you are set for some great laughs. Even so, I still had to skip a lot of this film (maybe I wasn't drunk enough). But slowed it down once Hasselhoff arrived (he was the reason I sought this out in the first place). This feels like a high school student's love letter to Star Wars made on a budget of whatever his weekly pocket money was. How the hell Christopher Plummer ended up in this utterly confounds me.
A redneck, robot cop.
A laser impervious Luke Skywalker.
A permed Hoff.
It's part STAR WARS, part FLASH GORDON, full ICE PIRATES.
This is equally one of the best and worst movies ever.
"These deadly rays will be your death"
Couldn't decide whether to give this one star or five, so settled on three.
It is terrible and very entertaining. Unlike most terrible movies, it is never boring.
They fire torpedoes full of men into space windows this movie is the best film is ever seen
Utterly ridiculous. This movie is a stupid, kitschy, clunky, dated, addle-brained and witless Star Wars ripoff that makes not a whit of sense. The performances are embarrassing. I can't begin to describe how awful it is.
In podcast form:
Oh boy, talk about a weird little movie! It stars Caroline Munro but also casts Christopher Plummer and David Hasselhoff as the Emperor and the Prince, respectively, so I’m thinking that they thought they were in a much, much bigger movie.
The fact that it came out between 1978 and 1979, right after Star Wars, also makes me think that Luigi Cozzi was trying to capitalize in the new space market but with exploitation movie budget. The result is this; a weird mish-mash of space clichés from the 70s.
Half-nude women. Weird androids. A weird redneck robot. Space royalty, lightsabers, “space magic”. It’s like a weird Turkish adaptation of Star Wars, only it’s not; it’s Italian-made and very much English.…
Star Wars was a cultural phenomenon seemingly from the moment it hit the public. Sci-Fi movies where in vogue again in a big way. It inspired countless rip-offs or other space adventures (feel free to disagree on any mentioned from here). It can't be no coincidence Star Trek finally got to the big-screen 2 years after Star Wars release, just as much it can't be no coincidence James Bond went into space for the first and only time for Moonraker in 1979. Roger Corman got in the act and give us Battle Beyond The Stars, on television Glen A. Larson give us Battlestar Galactica, which even got a lawsuit, Alien, a horror/sci-fi hybrid more then likely got the green light…
UPDATE 10/16/2015: L.A. 2017 seems to be the latest title in the list to go down. It's a feature-length episode…
Science fiction films from Europe and Russia. Most of which I am yet to watch.
Recently added lots of new…