I've always been interested in what other people are seeing and watching, and naturally, I love looking at Weekend Box…
The Expendables 2
Back for War.
Mr. Church reunites the Expendables for what should be an easy paycheck, but when one of their men is murdered on the job, their quest for revenge puts them deep in enemy territory and up against an unexpected threat.
"Ironic. Here we are you and I, and your knife. You're going to die, like him. What was his name? What did you call him? What does it matter?" - Jean Vilain
Round 2. Now how do you go about making a sequel to The Expendables that can live up to the very high standards (a trace of loving sarcasm can be found in this statement) set by the first one? Easy. The blueprint is already there, all you have to do is bring everyone back, amp everything up, give Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis more screen time (unfortunately Jet Li's will have to be reduced but that's understandable), bring in Chuck Norris for a scene-stealing moment and make Jean…
Is there a reverse equivalent of the Oscars? If so, here's my ballot:
Outstanding Performance in a Motion Picture (Drama) - Jean-Claude Van Damme
Outstanding Performance in a Motion Picture (Musical or Comedy [unintentional]) - Arnold Schwarzenegger
Worst Actor - Terry Crews
Worst Supporting Actor - Terry Crews
Person Who Gave Such A God Damn Awful Performance, It Can't Rightly be Called 'Acting' - Randy Couture
Most Understandable Accent - Jason Statham
Least Likely To Succeed - Terry Crews
Most Likely To Have Had His 4-Year Old Grandson Write The Dialogue - Sylvester Stallone
Winner of the 'What The Fuck Are You Doing In This Movie?' Award - Jet Li
Best Cameo - Chuck Norris
Most Likely To Have Been…
Six pounds of pure plutonium is powerful enough to change the balance of the world. Imagine what five tons will do.
This is probably the film the first Expendables should have been. The plot is kept simple and tight. There's dialogue that is legitimately funny. There's actual characterization done instead of just trying to make everyone look "cool". Lastly the bad CGI gore is toned down and is actually at an acceptable level this time.
Now if they would have stopped there this would have been a perfect action movie. Unfortunately there's still a few incredibly stupid moments in the film, but the ones that got to me the most was the overuse of meta-jokes. To say they're…
In every way this is better than the first film, and I really, really like the first film, so that's saying something. Easily the most fun I have had in a theater all year.
My biggest issue with the first Expendables movie was that with such an incredible cast of action legends past and present, it didn't hold true to the over-the-top, comically violent action cinema it was trying to evoke nostalgia for. The Expendables 2, I'm glad to say, sees Sylvester Stallone finally realise that - and while his sequel don't get me wrong suffers all the same creative issues as the first, it's triple the fun across the board. If you loved the films Stallone, Arnie, Willis, Norris et al... became famous for, there is no way you won't spend most of this with a broad, beaming smile.
Stallone wisely ejects too much of the cod-philosophising he infused the first film with…
I was going to review this film, but I think someone already summed up this film in the best way possible...
"This movie is big, dumb, and retarded just like Sylvester Stallone's forearms but you know what? If I had the chance to jerk off with those forearms, I'd still have fun which I did with this movie."
-Co-Host 3000 on Spill.com
Yeah, that's probably the best way to describe this. Big, dumb, and loads of fun.
You know what you get. It's so bad, it's actually a little entertaining. I mean, the villain is called vilain. Cheesy... Also, hidden in the weak script there's actually some kind of self-distance.
The script is merely an excuse for getting old action heroes a paycheck. The movie is unnecessary gory. When Jean-Claude Van Damme is doing the best acting, you know the rest of the team is underachieving. By the way, why the hell was Chuck Norris in the movie?
First Blood or Die Hard.
I loved the first Expendables because it ended up being exactly what I expected it to be. A long fight scene between a bunch of legendary action heroes(and Terry Crews)and a ton of nameless thugs for fodder and a corny plot to tie it all together. From the start of Dolph Lundgren's "warning shot" to it's credit roll I loved it, because it wasn't a serious movie. Just a movie with serious consequences to it's characters if they were to make a misstep. The cameo from the then CA state Governor was an ultimate treat as seeing these main heroes on screen at the same time was unheard of at this point. I've finally gotten around to seeing the second…
I have no idea why I watched this film.. and i have no idea why I enjoyed it so much. To be fair I had recently had an accident and was on some super duper pain meds.. but still, that is no excuse. I did miss Jet Li this time.
Lots of action, lots of CGI blood, and silly lines mixed in with the occasional gem. What is it with CGI blood and gore? It looks really awful in this movie and I prefer the blood/violence of good old fashion effects. I enjoyed the action and JCVD and Chuck Norris were pretty awesome in their small roles. However, they need more Jet Li. My favorite scene in the movie was Jet Li's awesome Kung fu and then he disappears for the rest of the movie! Boo!
2 stars for an okay movie with a boring narrative but some great action. Also, it gains half a star because Liam Hemsworth dies. Take that Gayle!
Now this is what the first film should have been a big fun cheesy action movies with all these action stars and Jean claude van damme as a villain (an awesome villain) each of these films kind of open the same way the expendables go and save someone who is being held hostage this time we have trench (Arnold Scwarzenegger) who is held hostage once again this is just Schwarzenegger's big exciting cameo (not really) he'll 'be back' later. now straight away you should know this movie of course isnt great and it most certainly has its flaws acting,script,plot etc but all I wanted out of this was to get what i didn't get in the first one fight scenes, big weapons, cheesy lines and van damme as a villain (because that's just amazing) I got all of that in this movie, i just kind of wish jet Li was in this movie a bit more than he was.
Fair. Not all of the cast get a lot to do, and far to much of the action is just spraying bullets, but it was entertaining.
Good fun. Doesn't take itself too seriously and does just enough story wise to keep you interested between the action set-pieces.
There are a lot of haters of this movie (and the Expendables series in general) but I will hold out that this movie is exactly what it intends to be, a hell of a good time. All the actors get the joke this time around, and they all look like they're having a lot of fun. I'm certainly not trying to make a claim that this is a great movie, but if you're willing to get on board and have a good time, I think there is no reason to avoid this film.
Enjoyed the 1st =- hated this and switched it off after 18 minutes! Enough said ...
- Sharky's Machine
- Absence of Malice
- On Golden Pond
- Richard Pryor: Live on the Sunset Strip
- In Your Hands
- Tuesday, After Christmas
- Six Shooter
Seeing as everybody else is going for it.
11,122 minutes wasted watching films
185 hours worth…
- Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy
- Glengarry Glen Ross
- The Great Escape
- L.A. Confidential
- The Thin Red Line
With The Avengers hitting screens next week I thought it a good time to highlight some other films with amazing…