Because fragile masculinity and stuff.
Scenes where men loudly crying are played for "jokes" (a lá Adam Sandler) will not…
Mr. Church reunites the Expendables for what should be an easy paycheck, but when one of their men is murdered on the job, their quest for revenge puts them deep in enemy territory and up against an unexpected threat.
Bigger, better & bloodier, The Expendables 2 is an explosive sequel to its predecessor that improves upon the original in almost every department & is a worthy addition to the newly established franchise. Continuing its homage to past action classics, the film hugely improves on the action, violence & humour aspects and the new recruits to its ensemble cast are unquestionably a welcome addition.
The Expendables 2 continues the journey of the notorious band of elite mercenaries who are reunited for a new assignment which seems like a seemingly simple operation but when one of their own is murdered on the job, the mission evolves into a quest for revenge as the group tries to avenge their loss by going one on one…
"Ironic. Here we are you and I, and your knife. You're going to die, like him. What was his name? What did you call him? What does it matter?" - Jean Vilain
Round 2. Now how do you go about making a sequel to The Expendables that can live up to the very high standards (a trace of loving sarcasm can be found in this statement) set by the first one? Easy. The blueprint is already there, all you have to do is bring everyone back, amp everything up, give Arnold Schwarzenegger and Bruce Willis more screen time (unfortunately Jet Li's will have to be reduced but that's understandable), bring in Chuck Norris for a scene-stealing moment and make Jean…
Is there a reverse equivalent of the Oscars? If so, here's my ballot:
Outstanding Performance in a Motion Picture (Drama) - Jean-Claude Van Damme
Outstanding Performance in a Motion Picture (Musical or Comedy [unintentional]) - Arnold Schwarzenegger
Worst Actor - Terry Crews
Worst Supporting Actor - Terry Crews
Person Who Gave Such A God Damn Awful Performance, It Can't Rightly be Called 'Acting' - Randy Couture
Most Understandable Accent - Jason Statham
Least Likely To Succeed - Terry Crews
Most Likely To Have Had His 4-Year Old Grandson Write The Dialogue - Sylvester Stallone
Winner of the 'What The Fuck Are You Doing In This Movie?' Award - Jet Li
Best Cameo - Chuck Norris
Most Likely To Have Been…
Six pounds of pure plutonium is powerful enough to change the balance of the world. Imagine what five tons will do.
This is probably the film the first Expendables should have been. The plot is kept simple and tight. There's dialogue that is legitimately funny. There's actual characterization done instead of just trying to make everyone look "cool". Lastly the bad CGI gore is toned down and is actually at an acceptable level this time.
Now if they would have stopped there this would have been a perfect action movie. Unfortunately there's still a few incredibly stupid moments in the film, but the ones that got to me the most was the overuse of meta-jokes. To say they're…
In every way this is better than the first film, and I really, really like the first film, so that's saying something. Easily the most fun I have had in a theater all year.
Well, I thought why the hell not do a double-bill following on from the original earlier today.
There were a couple of things I wanted addressed from the original. I didn't want Jet Li to look like such a feeble twat and I wanted Dolph Lundgren to be in it more. Both of these are addressed and even though Li pops out after the first quarter of an hour because he had to go and shoot another film, it's enough time for him to batter about two-dozen blokes with a frying pan though, so that's that attended to.
I don't know who thought it was a good idea to have Lundgren as…
I love the Expendables films but I think this is my favorite out of the three. Just so much fun.
Ecco il ritorno, con cast rimpolpato alla grandissima, del più cialtronesco gruppo di mercenari della storia del cinema. Si parte subito spediti, in un tripudio di trashate, pallottole ed esplosioni (per la verità inguardabili); poi si cerca di dare un minimo di consistenza alla sceneggiatura, così giusto per provarci un po', ma il risultato giustamente latita. Meno coinvolgente del primo, ma sicuramente più comico, partendo dal mitico Schwarzy per arrivare al solitario e "morriconiano" (che fantasia) Norris.
Sylvester Stallone (Rocky, 1976) desta vez fica apenas como roteirista e passa a direção para Simon West (Con Air, 1997) diretor já acostumado a trabalhar em obras e ação. E novamente temos uma grande homenagem aos filmes do gênero de ação dos anos 70/80/90, com direito a um elenco mais estelar ainda, desta vez incluindo também: Jean-Claude Van Damme (Bloodsport, 1988) e o mestre, e pai de todos, Chuck Norris (The Delta Force, 1986)!! Mais uma vez, o filme não tenta ganhar um oscar ou se preocupa em desenvolver um bom roteiro com diálogos grandiosos e história bem fundamentada. O negócio aqui volta a ser cenas de ação frenéticas, lutas, explosões, testosterona pura como o "quarteto fantástico" do gênero de…
Lots of 'pew-pew-pew' and things go 'boom'.
Sidenote: That 'Chuck Norris vs a Cobra'-joke was never meant to be spoken out loud guys c'mon.....
The epitome of juiced to the gills, snorting and spitting, bicep flexing, blood and guts everywhere nonsense. Though it was consistently very enjoyable, it never really hit a really high fun peak like I was hoping it would. Stallone looked extra melty in this one, like a ice lolly left out in the sun.
Also, all things considered, it's very possibly the most retarded movie I've ever seen, even more so than the first.
Needed more Van Damme.
The less fun than the first one, big dumb sequel.
A movie made entirely out of nostalgia, irony, and CGI. Poorly edited. Dolph Lundgren writes a solution to Einstein's theory of Special Relativity on a napkin, then blows his nose on it. What does that even mean? Stallone stabs a bad guy in the stomach, then asks someone "do you know how to carve a turkey?" I hate to point out the obvious, but these quips don't make sense at all.
Pretty decent action, better than the first in the franchise - Van Damme is especially good in this one.
Todavía no entiendo porqué me puse a verla.
A comprehensive, alphabetical list of films released in the United States that have been condemned by the Catholic Church since…