Sword and Sorcery / Medieval / Swords and Sandals / High Fantasy / RPG / Pen & Paper inspiration
The Scorpion King
Warrior. Legend. King.
In ancient Egypt, peasant Mathayus is hired to exact revenge on the powerful Memnon and the sorceress Cassandra, who are ready to overtake Balthazar's village. Amid betrayals, thieves, abductions and more, Mathayus strives to bring justice to his complicated world.
No clue how to rate this. One of the funniest movies I've seen in recent memory, and not in an ironic "so bad it's good" way. Dwayne Johnson is a real-life cartoon character, and even though he's famous I feel like he doesn't get near enough credit for his surprising range of abilities, and how brilliantly he carries even the dumbest movies (not to mention the emotional weight he gave to his PAIN & GAIN role, but I won't do a tangent raving about his every performance. you're welcome). The women here are very bad but the only white characters are the evil dudes so I guess it sort of evens out. A couple of downright beautiful shots and an ending moment so hilarious I rewound it twice, crying laughing.
Light-hearted action and adventure fun starring The Rock as The Rock and Kelly Hu in a never fully clothed turn as an optimistic Sorceress and it directly quotes the opening of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.
What's not to love?
Sublimely hilarious and truly bonkers, The Scorpion King is exactly the certain kind of big budget B-movie that I adore, thanks in no small part to a great early performance from Dwayne Johnson, who establishes himself as a blockbuster movie star.
Will purchase on Blu Ray for sure!
Something nobody ever mentions when talking about The Scorpion King, something I consider a significant omission, is that The Rock rides a camel in this film. Not just a little bit. A lot. Like all through the film. The Rock. On a camel.
Aside from that it's a fairly perfunctory sword and sandal thing. The guy's got charisma though, and it's never a chore to watch.
Yet another guilty pleasure in which a baby attempted to write a script and it failed in the best possible way.
why did I not remember there was a rock/metal soundtrack in the movie...
Dwayne Johnson...not quite his role, could've had better acting and the whole film seemed kinda dry and unoriginal.
Much like the Rock himself, this movie has zero body fat, an ebullient desire to please, and a high rate of success at doing so.
Listen to my review of The Scorpion King here: itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-scorpion-king/id1120635458?i=1000369963174&mt=2
Extraordinarily unoriginal but there are lots of big men doing fighting and it doesn't take itself seriously.
The VHS comes with a Godsmack music video after the credits that functions as a trailer.
Sums up the early 2000's similar to how Space Jam sums up the 90's.
It's completely awful but at the same time is so cheesy that it's likeable. Don't expect any amazing acting from anyone in this, but if you want some fun, then here's your film.
NOTE: The UK version is cut for a 12 certificate.
Not needed at all.
You know the story about the scorpion and the frog? Your friend The Rock didn't make it across the river.
A relic of the early 2000s, The Scorpion King is rife with hard rock music, bad CGI, and over-the-top action. It's simultaneously terrible and awesome at the same time, but it's bad enough that I won't be frequently rewatching.
All the films mentioned by name in Kim Newman's definitive encyclopedia of horror films, Nightmare Movies. Well worth a read.…