Films featuring varying levels of obvious and less obvious homoeroticism.
This Means War
It's SPY Against SPY
Two top CIA operatives wage an epic battle against one another after they discover they are dating the same woman.
There's a guy with a pistol and another guy with a pistol and a girl who fucks the one guy but also fucks the other guy and they all fuck and shoot and kiss and fuck and fight.
Now what's the word I'm looking for?
Piss poor in just about every aspect of film making? Njet.
Waste of talent? Non.
A veneered turd? Nee.
All of the above?
Yeah. That's it.
I have a fundamental issue with McG’s latest film, and not just because it is bad. Two best friends, on discovering that they have been dating the same woman, embark on an escalating battle with each other rather than following the simple maxim, bros before hos (it’s not even if they know if she gives mindblowing blow jobs at this point). So who exactly are we supposed to root for here? The two love blind schmucks or the unbelievably bland love interest who neither have any chemistry with. In fact there is more sexual tension between the BFF’s than with their object of desire. Witherspoon and Pine even meet over trying to rent the same film (the horrible remake of…
I think I should just recap the movie for everyone:
There are pretty people that do pretty people things. One pretty person likes another pretty person and that pretty person is liked by another pretty person. They decide to do some pretty person shenanigans in order to win the heart of that pretty person so they can have pretty people sex.
Are you unsure of who was who and who wanted to have sex with each other based on that review? So was I, because I thought the film was going to end with Kirk and Bane fucking each other.
I'm so happy that Tom Hardy and Chris Pine still have a career after this movie, because this almost ruined their acting career's, well to me it did.
This Means War is about these two deadly CIA operatives are inseparable partners and best friends until they fall for the same woman. Having once helped bring down entire enemy nations, they are now employing their incomparable skills and an endless array of high-tech gadgetry against their greatest nemesis ever - each other.
The one thing I always hate about these brain dead action comedy movies, is the fact that the action and comedy itself isn't well done and it feels out of place. Well what am I expecting from the same…
This Means Clichés
This Means Shit
This Means Awful
This Means Tom Hardy Can't Save It
This Means McG Sucks
This Means Implausible
This Means It Fails at Action
This Means It Fails at Comedy
This Means My Wife Picked It
This Means Fuck Her
Fuck it you get the point, the one star Is for Tom Hardy. This Means He Shouldn't Take Roles Like This.
This movie may have been better if it did away with the spy stuff. The spy scenes were lukewarm, and the humor that was based around it was even worse. A twist would have made this choice appropriate, but there was no twist to be found. It exists in its own dull world that I am gladly not a part of and was upset to be exposed to. Chelsea Handler was funny most of the time, and Reese Witherspoon is charismatic. This is nowhere near enough to carry the film.
Tom Hardy wasn't worth this.
this movie literally beats u in the face with everything doesn't it??? even the fucking blue eyes??? they're so blue??? the whole premise of this movie is that she can't choose between tom hardy as beautiful and lovely angel or chris pine as cunt who likes movies, which just proves that reese witherspoon in this is a fucking idiot. and she chose wrong in the end anyway. i hate everything about this movie other than tom hardy's face (even with weird aryan eyes) & i also hate chris pine now. i can't believe this is rated higher on rotten tomatoes than what's your number. further proof that critics are just white men who know nothing. also i blame lara for everything
Only half decent because Tom Hardy is thwre
This movie is like a Bollywood movie, and I don't mean that in a good way.
Honestly, the only reason I watched this is because Tom Hardy.
yet another movie ruined by heteronormativity
Tom is meera when she first lied about the xmen trailer & Chris is meera now, a fluent liar.
i remember this, chris pine made me suffer through this, this was bad, really bad and embarrassing bye
Hot, naughty, dirty, sensual movies.
These are films that I've seen over the years that I've either liked or loved, but A LOT of people…