This Means War
Its SPY Against SPY
Two CIA agents, Tuck and Frank who are also best friends, have been benched because someone's after them. Tuck is divorced with a son whom he's not close to and Frank is a ladies man. Tuck decides to try and find someone so he places his profile on a dating website. Lauren, a woman also looking for a guy sees tuck's profile and goes with him. She later bumps into Frank and he hits on her and she goes out with him. she's intrigued by both of them. When they learn that they're dating the same girl, they agree to let her choose. But both can't help but use their skills to keep tabs on her and each other. And also sabotage each others dates with her.
There's a guy with a pistol and another guy with a pistol and a girl who fucks the one guy but also fucks the other guy and they all fuck and shoot and kiss and fuck and fight.
I have a fundamental issue with McG’s latest film, and not just because it is bad. Two best friends, on discovering that they have been dating the same woman, embark on an escalating battle with each other rather than following the simple maxim, bros before hos (it’s not even if they know if she gives mindblowing blow jobs at this point). So who exactly are we supposed to root for here? The two love blind schmucks or the unbelievably bland love interest who neither have any chemistry with. In fact there is more sexual tension between the BFF’s than with their object of desire. Witherspoon and Pine even meet over trying to rent the same film (the horrible remake of…
Now what's the word I'm looking for?
Piss poor in just about every aspect of film making? Njet.
Waste of talent? Non.
A veneered turd? Nee.
All of the above?
Yeah. That's it.
I think I should just recap the movie for everyone:
There are pretty people that do pretty people things. One pretty person likes another pretty person and that pretty person is liked by another pretty person. They decide to do some pretty person shenanigans in order to win the heart of that pretty person so they can have pretty people sex.
Are you unsure of who was who and who wanted to have sex with each other based on that review? So was I, because I thought the film was going to end with Kirk and Bane fucking each other.
This Means Clichés
This Means Shit
This Means Awful
This Means Tom Hardy Can't Save It
This Means McG Sucks
This Means Implausible
This Means It Fails at Action
This Means It Fails at Comedy
This Means My Wife Picked It
This Means Fuck Her
Fuck it you get the point, the one star Is for Tom Hardy. This Means He Shouldn't Take Roles Like This.
Movie night at The Tomb, and as we couldn't decide on what to watch, we ended up watching This Means War, a film that no one wanted to watch. This movie is so offensive to good taste that it should be considered an act of terrorism, and director McG should be number one on every single government organization's most wanted list.
After watching this movie, I realized that current romantic comedies are exposing the changing nature of society better than any other art form. While I haven't seen many, the few I have seen from the last five years have been absolutely atrocious. No scene seems to last longer than thirty seconds, and it seems as if telling a coherent…
After 24 hours had passed since I watched "Drinking Buddies" I was still so emotionally distraught that it seemed to be the best course of action to scavenge my collection for a romcom that is the furthest away from real human emotions as possible. Naturally I ended up watching "This Means War".
Tom Hardy and Chris Pine play two secret agents wo are best friends and happen to fall in love with the same woman. Instead of resolving this like human beings they decide it's the best idea to both date her and sabotate the other's advances with every single bit of spy tech they can get their hands on, including drones and tranquilizer darts.
And by god this has…
Tom Hardy deserves 5 stars in everything but this movie.
The lovely story of two sociopaths trying to manipulate a woman into liking them, while destroying their friendship and a lot of property along the way. Astonishingly unlikeable characters make this a dire hateful film as they continue to make increasingly selfish decisions. Bad on so many levels.
Chris Pine and Tom Hardy are the reason I wanted to watch this. I was not let down by either of them.
Almost every minute of This Means War is a waste. All three actors are too old and too good to be acting in this type of movie. Leave this movie for Kate Hudson or John Krazinski. Tom Hardy and Chris Pine play CIA Agents fighting over a woman-Reese Witherspoon. I don't remember all their characters names because frankly, they don't matter. The plot is stupid because grown adults don't act this way in dating and CIA Agents would not use valuable assets to spy on a woman. I know it is supposed to be fun for the actors and for the viewer, but it is a time waster. There is never a minute for a character to develop. This movie is always on the the next thing. Also, look out for Chelsea Handler in the worst role ever! She plays herself from her talk show and she sucks!
This is what you get when you leave your wallet in DeKalb, Illinois and have to wait for the bar to open before you can go home. You must sit through this movie on HBO nursing a hangover.
I rarely have felt like having a drink the morning after, but this cookie cutter pile of garbage made me damn near take up a seat at the bar I embarrassed myself at.
There is little to no actual comedy in this movie, the romance is strange and forced, oh and there are spies, a secondary storyline that's serious and Chelsea Handler cast as the "funny" friend?
This feels like the over the top movie-within-a-movie in some other rom com about an arrogant action hero who meets his cute match.
McG's overstylized, loud and hurried movie tries really hard and it's shallow heart seems like it's in the right place.
It's a pleasant enough time waster. It's better than a lotta of these kinds of flicks I've watched. It has a plot and ridiculous amount of charm thanks to its leads.
My mom would like this. It's what I watch when I fold laundry or clean the kitchen.
This movie is a little like the cartoon spy v spy. Pine & Hardy are the highlight of this film. They interact very well together and have great chemistry. I find it a little hard to believe that 2 guys like this would fight so hard over someone like Reese Witherspoon.