Every film that has ever been nominated for an Academy Award in any category. Enjoy!
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Revenge is coming.
Sam Witwicky leaves the Autobots behind for a normal life. But when his mind is filled with cryptic symbols, the Decepticons target him and he is dragged back into the Transformers' war.
Stare into the abyss that is Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen and it blankly smiles back at you with slutty eye candy, repetitive repetition (I mean this can't actually even have a real script!), casual offensiveness and brain cell-killing mayhem; it's a true number two.
This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.
For a few minutes, I was starting to wonder if maybe I had judged this thing a little too harshly. Then there were literally 135 more minutes, most of them as shitty as a used diaper.
I am trying to find nice things to say about TRANSFORMERS 2. At least it's a wee bit more focused than the first movie, which has at least a half a dozen main characters and four different plots all going at once. There are, as always with Bay, some truly impressive visuals. Some of the character designs are legitimately impressive. And, y'know what? I kind of like Megan Fox. She's sort of charming in the rare moments Bay actually lets her speak.
Otherwise? It's not good, okay? It's. Just. Not. Good.
Teenage boy becomes a man and goes to college. He soon discovers that life at college can be difficult and maintaining a relationship with his girlfriend is hard.
The Transformers guest star in this movie and there are a few cameos by some explosions.
famously a strike picture and filmed around its injured star, its authorship given almost exclusively over to Michael Bay, this is what happens when you let him jerry-rig a $200 million tentpole. utterly shapeless mayhem, lurching, leaping from one explosion of excess to the next, blissfully and almost antagonistically unself-conscious, a diamond forced into existence by a kryptonite-poisoned Superman's fist. not only does this feature a gigantic parachute-farting alien robot disguised as a Lockheed SR-71 Blackbird, it is also packed with the as-yet-unrivaled densest, most ostentatiously near-abstract frames (and some of the most beautiful and plastic and destructive) of Bay's career, and it is a glorious cacophony of burning chrome, corporate manifest destiny, and shitty gay jokes. the finale takes place (and was actually filmed) atop the Great Pyramid of Giza, just because. this is what Milton meant when he wrote that the Devil saw how awful goodness was, except that Bay feels no loss of virtue to pine.
It's dumb, offensive, a little tasteless and LONG. And yet, I think this might be the one I prefer over the others in the series. Is that bizarre?
Long, but full of lively action, and more explosions than you could imagine. Writers Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman continue to provide plenty of fan service, with characters and such as Soundwave, The Fallen, and Jetfire, Pretenders brought into the mix along with the fabled Matrix of Leadership. Plenty of creative ideas with the robot designs and concepts, but don't expect the plot to rise above mumbo-jumbo if you're not a Transfan.
Giant robots fighting, with moments of humour interspersed. Looks pretty too though I did have some trouble keeping up with what the hell was going on in the fights. Basically the 1st film but with more robots and less human crap, which is good here.
Well... The images move at least.
I really wanted to completely hate this but the action is still surprisingly effective, the awful Bayism's are still unintentionally funny and there are gigantic robot testicles.
Not terrible, if anything it's actually entertaining in parts. Now, I saw "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" before the original. at the time, I thought it was awesome. After seeing the others though, the flaws started to become more and more existent. Yes, the effects and action do still impress, but that's not enough to compensate for the rest of the film's flaws. First, it has a habit of rehashing elements from the first film like the Mission City battle. It even retreads our villain, Megatron. I find that to be cheap. Also, the humor falls rather flat. It tends to be rather juvenile and unfunny. While it doesn't fall into "Batman and Robin" territory but it irritates me quite…
If you removed all of the dialogue from this, took all of the action scenes and seamlessly edited them together (without context or the burden of "narrative" or whatever the fuck Michael Bay calls the wordy bits in between explosions--which shouldn't be that difficult) into one long amalgamation of loud, shooty, stupid, explody, *stuff*, then you might be able to make a decent abstract film out of it.
Mr Bay, please stop. I beg of you! I can't take another 3 hours of robots smashing things!!! I guarantee that the only type of people who like these films are 19 year old males who have skin that resembles pizza that live in their parent's basement and have never touched a women's hand. I'm not sure what was worse, the character name of Sam Witwicky (arguably the worst name in cinema history), Megan Fox or the offensive ''ghetto stereotype'' talking robots. I spent the whole movie wishing to be in the center of one of Mr Bay's trademark fiery explosions before jumping into a pool of vinegar.
Obnoxiously loud garbage for fat virgins with body odor.
Transformers doesn't have much content, but it's so entertaining that it's getting good. The story doesn't have anything and the acting and directing is kind a bad. But it's a nice movie to relax and just see what happens with the robots and that kind of stuff. And we need to love the imagination they got to turn these silly things in great events.
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