Every film that has ever been nominated for an Academy Award in any category. Enjoy!
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen
Revenge is coming.
Sam Witwicky leaves the Autobots behind for a normal life. But when his mind is filled with cryptic symbols, the Decepticons target him and he is dragged back into the Transformers' war.
Stare into the abyss that is Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen and it blankly smiles back at you with slutty eye candy, repetitive repetition (I mean this can't actually even have a real script!), casual offensiveness and brain cell-killing mayhem; it's a true number two.
This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.
For a few minutes, I was starting to wonder if maybe I had judged this thing a little too harshly. Then there were literally 135 more minutes, most of them as shitty as a used diaper.
I am trying to find nice things to say about TRANSFORMERS 2. At least it's a wee bit more focused than the first movie, which has at least a half a dozen main characters and four different plots all going at once. There are, as always with Bay, some truly impressive visuals. Some of the character designs are legitimately impressive. And, y'know what? I kind of like Megan Fox. She's sort of charming in the rare moments Bay actually lets her speak.
Otherwise? It's not good, okay? It's. Just. Not. Good.
Teenage boy becomes a man and goes to college. He soon discovers that life at college can be difficult and maintaining a relationship with his girlfriend is hard.
The Transformers guest star in this movie and there are a few cameos by some explosions.
famously a strike picture and filmed around its injured star, its authorship given almost exclusively over to Michael Bay, this is what happens when you let him jerry-rig a $200 million tentpole. utterly shapeless mayhem, lurching, leaping from one explosion of excess to the next, blissfully and almost antagonistically unself-conscious, a diamond forced into existence by a kryptonite-poisoned Superman's fist. not only does this feature a gigantic parachute-farting alien robot disguised as a Lockheed SR-71 Blackbird, it is also packed with the as-yet-unrivaled densest, most ostentatiously near-abstract frames (and some of the most beautiful and plastic and destructive) of Bay's career, and it is a glorious cacophony of burning chrome, corporate manifest destiny, and shitty gay jokes. the finale takes place (and was actually filmed) atop the Great Pyramid of Giza, just because. this is what Milton meant when he wrote that the Devil saw how awful goodness was, except that Bay feels no loss of virtue to pine.
Locke Revisits the Transformers Franchise on Bluray.
Considered by many as the low point of the franchise, Revenge of The Fallen received much of the same praise as the first Transformers film, albeit in diminished quantities. A victim of the writers strike Revenge of the Fallen was rushed through production which is a shame as Bay initially seemed to have a clear idea of what he believed didn't work in the fist film and how he could fix it.
To get it out of the way, the quality of the Bluray is even worse than last time, why is so much of this so blurry? Honestly I'm inclined to assume this three film boxset uses some really shitty master of…
and this is where i stopped with the series....
There are not enough adjectives to describe how truly abysmal Revenge of the Fallen is. It's so awful that it reaches a completely, and possibly unrivaled, new level of awfulness. It's so awful that the dictionary should add it to the list of definitions for awful. Bay blames it on the writers strike, but that doesn't fly with me. Even after he admitted that it was crap, wish he would have told us beforehand that money grubbing whore. This is a film to be avoided at all cost, unless you really want a migraine, or you want to see John Turtorros bare ass, or are into self-mastication and want to suffer. Let's not even go into the racist twin robots, or the juvenile humor, or the awful story. Truly one of the worst films ever made.
This movie is nowhere near 4 stars but my nephew loved it and made watching it a 4 star experience.
This is a continuation to my review of the Transformers series. I feel like there were a few interesting scenes in this film, but they were surrounded by mindless robot combat. With a running time of over 2 hours and 15 minutes, they could have certainly cut out some of the more useless scenes. Most of the scenes in the movie that actually develop the plat aren't too bad. I also feel like the climax of the movie felt sort of hollow. The film was dragged out to last over 2 hours, yet the ending is rather quick. It left me with somewhat of a "is that it?" reaction.
It is sad to say, but the most exciting part during…
Well more of the same again, only longer, louder but a smidge less pervy. Wahlberg is a vast improvement on LaBeouf, and even though I quite liked Turtorro in the others I thought Tucci was far better as the comic relief. And as I said a bit less pervy, though jokes about how the girl should not be wearing such short shorts did not stop the camera getting right up there at every opportunity.The plot jumps around all over the place and the action sequences while better than previously still are hard to follow. So all in all still Meh. Just longer Meh.
If you want robots, watch Terminator: Salvation instead. If you want humor, go see Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs. If you want to be entertained, watch ANYTHING other than this. Seriously. You may thank me later (I am so glad I didn't spend money on this because oh, heads would be rolling!).
For about an hour Revenge of the Fallen is just a bad movie. It's got some really terrible attempts at comedy, and a few horrendous moments of misogyny, but it's nothing we haven't seen from Michael Bay before. Then, around the sixty minute mark, Bay suddenly realises that the film needs a plot so introduces a geriatric, flatulent, inexplicably British robot who magics everyone to Egypt and says "Oh by they way, here's the plot of the movie." From there it just seems that everyone lets out a collective "fuck it", and lets the film steam roll itself into the ground. Revenge of the Fallen then transforms (LOL) into a grotesque mutation of robo-testicles, robo-racism and a load of other robo-related shite. Horrendous all round.
i didn't tell anyone at the time because of the shame, but i totally rewatched the transformers trilogy before 4.
- The Racket
- 7th Heaven
- Sunrise: A Song of Two Humans
- Chang: A Drama of the Wilderness
- The Hunger
- Fright Night
- Near Dark
- The Lost Boys
If you owned your very own movie theater and got to program the films it exhibited as you desired, what…
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