What to Expect When You're Expecting
I'm calling bull$#!%. Pregnancy sucks.
A look at love through the eyes of five interconnected couples experiencing the thrills and surprises of having a baby, and ultimately coming to understand the universal truth that no matter what you plan for, life doesn't always deliver what's expected.
This took all my years of film training not to turn it off within the opening ten minutes and it never improved. In fact if I was a woman I’d be offended that this is the sort of shit Hollywood tries to shove in my face in the name of entertainment. It’s a horrible excuse for a film in every conceivable way from its excruciatingly unfunny attempts at humour to its ultra-conservative message (notice which couple suffer from a miscarriage - no doubt punishment for getting pregnant from a one night stand).
The five interconnected stories about the trials and tribulations of pregnancy are predominantly played for laughs and follow the same template - the woman is confident about wanting…
Perfectly captures the pain and agony of childbirth.
Well, I'm calling it: pregnancy sucks.
A dramedy based on an honest to God pregnancy guide, not a novel, but an actual guide for pregnancy. What could possibly go wrong? You would think it would be hard to get an actual story out of a "pregnancy guide" and after watching this film I would guess that assumption to be right. Lionsgate's President of Motion Picture Productions, Alli Shearmur, said this had potential to be a franchise. This is what's wrong with fucking Hollywood.
There is nothing to analyze. The film features five couples who are expecting kids... and that is IT. Apparently whenever screenwriter Heather Hach would have a hard time thinking of anything remotely resembling a plot, she…
What to expect when you're expecting. Expect the worst. I could have done with some gas and air myself to get through it.
I make it a point to never touch my face so as to preserve my extremely delicate complexion. I haven't put a single finger to my face in over two years. If anyone else touches my face, they die. I've racked up quite a body count. But I would rather rub a greasy rotisserie chicken across my forehead than watch this cuntstain again.
I'm gong to pay dearly for forcing my husband to watch this.
"You dropped your kid off a changing table?!"
"Stuff just happens, okay? Last week, my kid ate a cigarette."
"I caught him playing in the dryer yesterday."
"I picked up the wrong baby from daycare."
"I found my baby swimming in the toilet. No judging."
Pretty decent movie.
Hilarious roles from Chris Rock, Rebel Wilson, and Thomas Lennon.
Terrible performances from Matthew Morrison, Jennifer Lopez and Cameron Diaz.
I watched this because it was written by the same chick who wrote Whip It, which, as you all should know, is one of my all time favorite movies, a film that injects immense amounts of heart and beautiful, sweet truth into a story that could have been a trite little comedy.
So you can see why I thought there was a chance this would be good.'
Good Lord was I wrong.
If this is really what you should expect when you're expecting... I would blow my brains out if I ever got pregnant.
The film itself is birth control.
A nice movie for recent moms but dont watch if you are single :))
This film bears no resemblance to the book of the same name. Nor does it offer any helpful advice about what to expect other than farts.
Recent review of my initiative A Yearlong Film Viewing Balancing Act revealed that not a single man directed film I’ve seen in the almost 6 months was written solely by women. I figure that’s a real lack of balance… so I’m on the lookout for films written by women and helmed by men. Now that I have my director gender balance viewing worked out pretty well, I figure I can expand…. to work on greater balance in other areas. I am going to look at writers, cinematographers, and editors as my next balancing wave. No rules. Just an intent to move into greater balance in those areas in the second half of the year.
Here’s one: What to Expect when…
An unmemorable film not worth a lengthy review. Another generic, hollow and stale rom-com.
Dear Heather Hach, Co-Screenwriter for WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU'RE EXPECTING,
I have no doubt that you were qualified to write the screen adaptation of What to Expect When You're Expecting. You've twice experienced the miracle of childbirth and surely possess the sort of arcane knowledge that the best-selling pregnancy guide, first published in 1984, has provided to a generation of expectant moms. I'll even concede that the task assigned to you and co-writer Shauna Cross was near-impossible: adapt an instructional non-fiction health manual into a Hollywood film big enough to accommodate any number of ascending B-list and declining A-list stars.
So, what happened?... (CONT'D)