It's not that it doesn't make sense. But I wish it wouldn't have. I'd be able to handle no sense a lot better than "artistic" *eye-roll*
So when hating the plot, there's only one thing left to like. The visuals. Emily Browning is fucking adorable, and I do not mind looking at her for 110 minutes, but even that was ruined by complete and utterly cringe-worthy CGI.
Two stars. One for Emily Browning, and one for the best opening scene I have seen in a long, long, long time... well.. since Watchmen!
Recommended by theNomad.
I can't be bothered to write a wall-of-text review for this one.
I left my flying fuck as it died in-front of my TV, and now I have none.
I know I have a spare somewhere, but I can't be bothered to look.
A flying fuck would probably kill one or two people, so best I just leave it.
"John Dies at the End" is "Detention" and "Grabbers" retarded cousin.
The one you want absolutely nothing from,…
Imagine if every fleeting paranoia or subconscious concern you’d ever entertained had been instantly ratified as true in your mind. Further imagine that any inhibitions you might have regarding doing harm to another human being had been completely removed.
It’s New Year’s Eve and all communication devices have spontaneously begun to emit a chaotic visual and sonic pattern, doing strange things to people watching or even listening to it.
Nearly everyone within range of this unknown broadcast starts acting on…
The good: It's not like Pirates of the Caribbean.
The bad: It's not like Pirates of the Caribbean.
The Lone Ranger is visually impressive, but the story is as empty as Armie Hammer's stare.
I also did not appreciate the somewhat forced comedy, and stupidly unrealistic action sequences.
Just as the first V/H/S had a main plot leading into all the different stories, V/H/S/2 handles things the exact same way.
But with two exceptions and differences.
1. The main plot is the creepiest out of them all, and 2. there are no douchebags throughout the whole thing.
They must have listened when people complained about "no likeable characters" in the original, because this is one major change.
Searching for a missing student, two private investigators break into his…
Recommended by theNomad (oh dear).
What the hell just happened? The announcement of this sequel stirred up quite a bit of excitement in the horror community, and while the original film isn't exactly ground-breaking, it was still pretty entertaining.
In this sequel the motives have become blurred and are just a mishmash of random ideas.
In "The Collector", we watch a guy kill and torture people in their own home because he likes it. He had this sense of mystery…
Oh great mother of bad CGI, mother to the son of cheesy scenes with double-extra cheese on top, wife to the big father of all things badly written.
On the other hand. Ryan Reynolds kinda proved himself in this film. He's still far from my first choice of.. anything. But at least he proved that he's able to act without being totally punch-worthy. Bravo.
"No! Carrie please don't hurt me."
"Why not? I've been hurt my whole life."
I'm NOT going to rip this film to pieces.
I'm NOT going to - step by step - belittle and compare it to the original, because I haven't seen it.
What I am going to do, is tell you how surprised this film made me, and how stupidly great an experience this were.
I had a feeling that Chloë Grace Moretz would fail miserably as Carrie...…