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  • La La Land

    La La Land

    ★★★★★

    100% uncut, high-grade, pure joy.

  • Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

    Rogue One: A Star Wars Story

    ★★

    Very deserving of officially being called a Star Wars prequel.

    This is not a Star Wars movie.

    It's wonder-less, adventure-less and humourless (unless you count the totally sweet ironic meta-humour the the kids today love courtesy of Sass-3P0). It's a franchise Spin-off that paid the rights to the name holder so that their boring, lifeless characters could dress up as people you liked.

    FUN FACT: They have a new Jar-Jar in this movie named Grand Moff Tarkin which pushes the…

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  • Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    I don't want to beat a dead horse here, but such a fucking boring drag. From about frame one.....

    There are many moments that make me question if Snyder understands basic narrative at all. Hmmm, when's a good time to intro some slow, pointless Justice league info, shown to us while someone slowly and methodically parses some computer files? I've got it! The shot after literally introducing a ticking countdown clock during the climax! Brilliant!*

    *not sure if it's the…

  • Jurassic World

    Jurassic World

    ★½

    This could have been so much fun.

    But the most amazing thing about this movie, is that instead of feeling like a 14 years later sequel, it just feels like another hastily thrown together in a long line of every couple of years type of installment.

    This movie also elevates fan pandering to some kind of meta art form wherein you could spend most of the movies runtime picking out shots, characters, designs, vehicles, et al that reference better elements…