Josh Keown | Night Terror Novels 🧛🏻♂️’s review published on Letterboxd:
“Do your thing, cuz!”
-Heather Miller (Alexandra Daddario)
Ahoodehaha, yes I watched this movie. Why? Why did I watch it? Why on earth did I watch it when I could already tell it was going to be complete and utter garbage? I don’t know. I supposed it lived up to its terrible reputation at the very least.
This film raises a lot of questions, actually. Like, for example, how could this franchise sink any lower than it already had in Leatherface: Texas Chainsaw Massacre III and Next Generation? How could this abominable, cringe-inducing script be the best that three writers could come up with, or more to the point, why would anyone fund it after reading it? And what about the story, the incredibly idiotic twist that defies belief, and logic, by screwing up the entire timeframe? Ridiculousness.
Now usually I’m all for seeing old Leatherface saw up some intolerable teenage stereotypes, but this film couldn’t even get that right. The teens are so bland, Daddario’s lead so detestable, and the new Leatherface so unimposing beside Hansen’s, or even Andrew Bryniarski in the prequel. Oh, and unfortunately Mr. Eastwood’s son doesn’t seem to demonstrate any of his Pop’s acting talent here.
There is so little of worth on offer here, certainly nothing to distinguish this above the stacks of similar horror drivel that have mounted up over the past decade or so. At least the remake/prequel had their own feel to them; this one is a straight-up money grab with no identity of its own. On a largely menial note, Richard Riehle makes an appearance, a man who seems to just pop up in the strangest of places and always looks the same no matter how many years have passed. That’s about all I took from this. And that tits sell tickets, ‘cause that’s the only logical reason for Daddario’s casting.
VERDICT; A shameful entry into the franchise that blemishes the original’s reputation with its sacrilege. Texas Chainsaw 3D (fuck off 3D) just serves as another nail to be hammered into the horror genre’s coffin. I’m never going to give up hope that one day it’ll see the revival it so desperately needs, though…
2/5 or 4/10