Josh has written 28 reviews for films released in 2012.
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Zombie A-Hole 2012
"There's a world all around us, Castor. The line between life and death is a LOT blurrier than anybody realises. Sometimes, corpses don't stay down."
- Frank Fulci (Josh Eal)I'm not sure why this is listed as having a mere one minute run time on the database, but I can tell you that I would have prefered it if it did.
Just one in a string of underground horror films (that shows no sign of stopping, regrettably) from director… -
Heaven and Hell 2012
(This is just a repost of my first review for Heaven and Hell since this is a duplicate page...)
"Poop in my pants? I'm about to be knee deep in my own shit!"
- Lerm (Don't know the actor's name, but his snake tattoos are really something)So whilst I was researching (read: just scrolling through lists) films for my anthology horror list, I came across this recent Taiwanese outing. Although I am a firm believer in the saying 'don't…
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Heaven and Hell 2012
"Poop in my pants? I'm about to be knee deep in my own shit!"
- Lerm (Don't know the actor's name, but his snake tattoos are really something)So whilst I was researching (read: just scrolling through lists) films for my anthology horror list, I came across this recent Taiwanese outing. Although I am a firm believer in the saying 'don't judge a book by its cover', I liked the posters and that was pretty much the only reason I…
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Redd Inc. 2012
"Let's get this straight. I am NOT a murderer. I am a regional manager!"
- Regional Manager Thomas Reddmann (Nicholas Hope)Another night, another helping of horror from the Horror Channel, and compared to some of the awful garbage they have played in the past (and future, if the following showing tonight of the entirely unnecessary House on Haunted Hill remake is anything to go by), Redd Inc., or Inhuman Resources, or Redd Inc.: Inhuman Resources, isn't actually all that…
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Spring Breakers 2012
“You're my mother fuckin' soul-mates.”
-Alien (James Franco)Spring Breakers; The American Dream becomes the American Neon-Nightmare in this coming of age tale gone horribly wrong. Schlocky, erratic and oh so hellish, the latest film from distinctive director Harmony Korine is something of a wonder to this here film fanatic.
I saw a trailer for an old documentary the day before watching this, which focussed on those aptly titled ‘Midnight Movies’ they had back in the day – trashy pictures…
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Dredd 2012
“In case you have forgotten, this block operates under the same rules as the rest of the city. Ma-Ma is not the law... I am the law.”
-Judge Dredd (Karl Urban)A film is a film. A film adaptation, not matter from which source material it is derived, should succeed predominantly as a film above all else. The Lord of the Rings, adapted from Tolkien’s novels, works as a standalone series of film. Sin City, from the comic series of…
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Red Lights 2012
“We called Ptolemy insane, we spat in the face of Galileo, we burned Giordano Bruno... What did we need? What do we need in order to learn? What makes us be what we are? What finally makes us come to accept? What makes us believe?”
-Simon Silver (Robert De Niro)I can’t really understand all the hate that faced this film upon its release earlier in the year, seeing it now. Although I’m certainly not going to declare Rodrigo Cortés’…
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Silent Night 2012
“It ain’t all candy canes and Christmas lights. Christmas can fuck you up.”
-Stein Karsson (Mike O’Brien)In this very loose remaking of ludicrously camp slasher Silent Night, Deadly Night, poor old Malcolm McDowell (revered in the underbelly of cult films for his deranged 1971 turn as Alex DeLarge in A Clockwork Orange) stamps his career further down the drainpipe with Silent Night.
Okay, so it’s not all that bad, but it certainly isn’t the festive cult classic I think…
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Chained 2012
“In one ear and out the window.”
-Bob (Vincent D’Onofrio)Though I may be alone in this, I would argue that Jennifer Chambers Lynch, daughter of the infamous master of mystery David Lynch, isn’t as bad a director as many would have you believe. Her debut, Boxing Helena from 1993, a film generally vilified by cinemagoers and critics alike – I didn’t hate it at all. Her second feature, Surveillance, again released to mixed reviews (though considerably more hatred than…
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The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey 2012
“Home is now behind you. The world is ahead.”
-Gandalf the Grey (Ian McKellen)Is it true? Can there be fact behind the rumours, the whisperings of naysayers? Has Peter Jackson really gone and defiled one of the best loved novels from esteemed author J.R.R Tolkien? Is The Hobbit truly just style over substance? It cannot be!
Thankfully, my avid Middle-Earthers, such is not the case, certainly not for fans of the mythical and magical world Tolkien created. But, I…
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Cockneys vs Zombies 2012
“Oi, zombies! Get the fuck out of my East End!”
-Ray Macguire (Alan Ford) Cockney accent required to read properly.Right, before I proceed with my incessant babbling about the film, I must first state that I didn’t really go into this with the same mind-set as most other horror films. Though the premise (and even title) bears striking resemblance to similar ‘zom-coms’ such as Zombie Strippers or Ninjas VS Zombies (yes, there is such a thing), I was willing…
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Excision 2012
"Come closer. I want to show you the detailed work I did on Grace's sutures. It's a mess... I know! It's.. it's just my first surgery! I haven't perfected my technique!"
-Pauline (AnnaLynne McCord)Being the massive horror fan that I undeniably am, it’s fair to say I was fairly excited when word reached my ears about Excision, a dark comedy-horror from debutant director Richard Bates Jr. (who also directed the 2008 short film upon which this is based). It…