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  • Twins of Evil 1971

    ★★★ Rewatched 20 Feb, 2015

    Entertaining late period Hammer from the same team that brought you all those lesbian vampire affairs so beloved of boys my age.
    It's a bizarre blend, adding a Witchfinder General knock-off storyline to the standard vampire fare as Cushing's ruthless hag hunter finds himself butting heads with local Count Karnstein, unaware the Count is a vampire who has set his sights on Cushing's pure and chaste (and pretty damn sexy) twin neices.

    The Whitchfinder vibe continues with an underwritten hero…

  • Nine to Five 1980

    ★★★★ Rewatched 18 Feb, 2015

    Much, much funnier than I remember from seeing this as a teenager. Maybe those years as a worker drone are required to fully appreciate this well made farce, which has some themes that still resonate today.

  • The Keeper 2009

    ★★ Watched 15 Feb, 2015

    Seagal is a retired cop who's asked by an old buddy to bodyguard his daughter who has been pegged for a kidnapping due to her boyfriend being a boxer who needs persuading to take a dive.

    Much standard, low-budget thumping and window breaking ensues.

    More engaging than the standard 'Fat Seagal'-period straight to DVD thrillers, but that's not saying much.

  • Satan's Slave 1976

    ★½ Rewatched 07 Feb, 2015

    The 'continental version' with the additional scissors unpleasantness which Warren never wanted included so strictly this isn't the uncut version.

    Anyway... i really enjoyed this when I saw it a few years back. Now I found it all little tedious despite tons of gore and gratuitous nudity.

  • The Concorde... Airport '79 1979

    Watched 06 Feb, 2015

    Everything you've heard is right. Utterly terrible but still gloriously entertaining and probably the most watchable of the series.

    1 star or four stars depending on your mood.

  • Deadly Prey 1987

    ★★ Rewatched 09 Jan, 2015

    It's got zero budget. The acting is awful. The script is dire. The direction amateurish.
    But it's certainly not dull and by god is it funny.

  • The Guest 2014

    ★★★★ Watched 03 Jan, 2015

    What an absolute treat.

    Fans of 80s slashers or those with a slightly black sense of humour will probably get more out of it than your standard thriller fan.
    Luckily that is me.

  • Remo Williams: The Adventure Begins... 1985

    ★★★½ Rewatched 01 Jan, 2015

    Underrated and under appreciated fun 80s action flick. In hindsight it's easy to see why it didn't click with audiences as the makers deliberately went out of their way to avoid the Arnie/Sly cliches of big guns, bigger muscles and the biggest explosions in favour of a blue collar hero in the portly shape of Fred Ward, trained in a made up martial art by Joel Grey in astonishing make up to make him look like an 80 year old…

  • Batman Returns 1992

    ★★★★ Rewatched 21 Dec, 2014

    Still perhaps my favourite big screen outing for Batman. It is an unholy mess story-wise but it looks simply amazing and reminds you what a brilliant visual director Burton can be, even if he still struggles with the action set pieces or a coherent plot.

  • Silent Night 2012

    ★★½ Watched 13 Dec, 2014

    More of a remake of Christmas Evil than Silent Night Deadly Night, as a vengeful santa rampages through a town dishing out justice to the naughty (including, wonderfully, a child). More attention is paid to the investigating cops than to the killer himself, but his exploits are suitably gory and grotty to make the enterprise at least watchable.
    The acting is uniformily poor, with Malcolm McDowell on fine "what is this shit?" form, though Donal Logue is good as a grumpy travelling Santa who delivers a wonderful "What is Christmas anyway?" monologue.

  • Reindeer Games 2000

    ★★ Rewatched 14 Dec, 2014

    There's the germ of a good idea here, but sadly Frankenheimer's last major film is a massive disappointment.
    Affleck is not too bright as the prisoner who adopts the persona of his dead cell mate to hook up with his pen pal Charlize Theron, but her brother has sights on him too to help him rob a rather ropey looking casino on Christmas Eve.
    Various twists abound and characters act in stupid ways merely to advance the plot.
    A good…

  • Kiss Kiss Bang Bang 2005

    ★★★★½ Rewatched 06 Dec, 2014

    Just gets more perfect everytime I watch it. Introduced some friends to it this time, who loved it too. My work here is done.