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  • Magic Mike XXL

    Magic Mike XXL 2015

    ★★★★★ Added

    Recently I said that the five stars I gave Inside Out were the least complicated stars I'd ever given, in terms of internal debate. Well, we have another contender for that weird & unclear trophy, because Magic Mike XXL is joy, is euphoria, is cinema as multiple orgasm. I await the day it's treated as the milestone & work of alchemical genius it truly is. A perfect movie.

  • Transformers: Age of Extinction

    Transformers: Age of Extinction 2014

    ★★★ Added

    The main thing that transformed when I watched this latest example of Le Cinema du Bay was my understanding of what cinema is meant for. Eyes open, I now wander the world of movies with new assessment parameters. Every movie must have Stanley Tucci. He is the Alpha and Omega. If a movie is not a delivery mechanism for pure, uncut Tucci, it is meaningless. This would've been a five star review if the movie hadn't been 675 hours long. Nevertheless, significantly better than Jurassic World (because Tucci).

Popular reviews

  • Alice in Wonderland

    Alice in Wonderland 2010

    ½ Added 12

    Was Hook not a lesson to us all not to tamper with works of wonder? Tim Burton’s mystifyingly popular re-imagining of Lewis Carroll’s Alice stories does many things wrong even just on a surface level: that tedious Danny Elfman score; the weird obsession with violence against eyes; the torpor that infects everyone as they stand stiffly in front of green screens; the lazy cribbing from the Lord of the Rings films; introducing the amazing Mia Wazikowska to a wider audience…

  • Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World

    Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World 2003

    ★★★★★ Rewatched 26 Mar, 2012 7

    Once more it turns up on Sky and I stop everything to watch it yet again. My second favourite movie of the Noughts, after The Incredibles. Pure joy from start to finish, impeccably made, inspiring and exciting and oh God I just want nineteen sequels why why is that suddenly too much to ask?!?!?