I came at this with my expectations set pretty darn low. It was incredibly amusing in a ridiculous pulp wind of way and that's exactly what it set out to be.

Wonderfully slow. Every single shot in the film is truly picture perfect.

Somebody please rip off one of Johnny Depp's legs and beat Tim Burton to death with it. This film is the shit cherry on top of the nightmare sundae that has become the second half of Burton's career.

Retro Noir (literally). "The Pin" is probably the finest Coen Brother-like character to not appear in a Coen Brother film.