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  • Eaten Alive 1977

    ★★★ Watched 26 Jan, 2015 1

    Name's Buck, and I'm rarin' to fuck.
    -Buck

    Tobe Hooper followed up The Texas Chain Saw Massacre with another story inspired by "true events", this time being serial killer Joe Ball, aka The Alligator Man, aka The Butcher of Elmendorf, aka Bluebeard of South Texas. Not being able to decide on a single moniker hurt his popularity over the years.

    The film is an exploitation mess, but a mess that is never dull to watch. The film opens up with…

  • Marty 1955

    ★★★★ Watched 24 Jan, 2015 4

    See, dogs like us, we ain't such dogs as we think we are.
    -Marty Pilletti

    A ridiculously charming film about a middle aged butcher that falls in love when he had given up hope on ever even meeting a woman that would be interested in him. Like so many people, even today, Marty lives his life feeling sorry for himself but also loses track of what makes him happy as opposed to what his buddies will think of him or…

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  • Guardians of the Galaxy 2014

    ★★★★½ Watched 31 Jul, 2014 48

    I am Groot.
    -Groot

    I am Groot. I AM Groot! I'm Groot. I am GROOT? I'm GROOT! I AM GROOT?! I am Groot! I AM Groot. I'm Groot?! I am GROOT! I'm GROOT? I AM GROOT. I am... GROOT!

    I am GROOT. I AM GROOT! I'm GROOT?! I AM Groot? I'm Groot! I am Groot?! I am Groot? I AM Groot?! I'm Groot? I am GROOT?! I'm GROOT. I AM GROOT? I... AM... GROOOOOOOT!

    ************SPOILER WARNING************
    I am Groot.
    ************END OF SPOILERS************

  • Jaws: The Revenge 1987

    ½ Rewatched 02 Jul, 2013 59

    Roar!
    -Shark

    Instead of doing a review I will just point out the crap that inhabits this film.

    - The shark roars like a lion.
    - Mario Van Peebles does a Jamaican accent
    - The shark swims from New York to the Bahamas in less then 3 days.
    - This is the sequel that popularized the tagline "This time it's personal!"
    - African Americans feet apparently look Caucasian under water
    - The god damn shark is hunting one family, even…