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  • No Escape

    No Escape 2015

    ★★½ Watched 22 Jul, 2016

    What are you? British CIA?
    -Jack Dwyer

    Well made "white people stuck in the terror of a foreign country" thriller avoiding being outright racist, but also not showing much fucks given about the native people being killed around all the white people.

    Ultimately what made it a mediocre experience for me is that it couldn't decide whether or not it wanted to be a realistic gritty thriller or a Hollywood action movie. Need to pick one and then go for broke. Pierce Brosnan is of course perfect as a suave and slightly sleazy badass.

  • Why Horror?

    Why Horror? 2014

    ★★ Watched 22 Jul, 2016

    The beautiful thing about genre fans, whether it be sci-fi, comic books, horror and everything in between, is that perfect strangers can strike up conversations at conventions about something they're both passionate about. Agreeing on what they love, disagreeing about what's best, ect.

    The annoying thing about genre fans are the ones that are less interested in talking about what they love and more interested in talking about how big a fan they are. Trying to prove that they're a…

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  • Guardians of the Galaxy

    Guardians of the Galaxy 2014

    ★★★★½ Watched 31 Jul, 2014 51

    I am Groot.
    -Groot

    I am Groot. I AM Groot! I'm Groot. I am GROOT? I'm GROOT! I AM GROOT?! I am Groot! I AM Groot. I'm Groot?! I am GROOT! I'm GROOT? I AM GROOT. I am... GROOT!

    I am GROOT. I AM GROOT! I'm GROOT?! I AM Groot? I'm Groot! I am Groot?! I am Groot? I AM Groot?! I'm Groot? I am GROOT?! I'm GROOT. I AM GROOT? I... AM... GROOOOOOOT!

    ************SPOILER WARNING************
    I am Groot.
    ************END OF SPOILERS************

  • Jaws: The Revenge

    Jaws: The Revenge 1987

    ½ Rewatched 02 Jul, 2013 68

    Roar!
    -Shark

    Instead of doing a review I will just point out the crap that inhabits this film.

    - The shark roars like a lion.
    - Mario Van Peebles does a Jamaican accent
    - The shark swims from New York to the Bahamas in less then 3 days.
    - This is the sequel that popularized the tagline "This time it's personal!"
    - African Americans feet apparently look Caucasian under water
    - The god damn shark is hunting one family, even…