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  • Jane Got a Gun

    Jane Got a Gun 2015

    ★½ Watched 27 Apr, 2016

    Bishop boys are coming I need a gunslinger.
    -Jane Hammond

    Once a fan of Natalie Portman, I'm becoming more convinced as the years go by that she's actually an actress of limited range and needs a certain type of director to get great performances out of her. Unfortunately Gavin O’Connor isn't that "certain type" of director. In his defense though he inherited Portman along with this movie when Lynne Ramsay abruptly left the production.

    Portman isn't incredibly bad here, it's…

  • Dune

    Dune 1984

    ★★★ Watched 26 Apr, 2016 4

    He who controls the Spice, controls the universe!
    -Baron Harkonnen

    I can't argue that this is a "good movie", but for what it lacks in excitement it makes up for with just being down right fascinating. The constant exposition, the sand worms, Baron Vladimir Harkonnen's herpe infected face, the constant exposition, Sting's weird underwear, what the hell Spice actually does, the constant exposition, Brad Dourif...

    I mean it's David Lynch... but "not David Lynch"... if that makes sense.

  • Alien

    Alien 1979

    ★★★★★ Rewatched 26 Apr, 2016 10

    Happy Alien Day! (the first ever!)

    I attempted to review this on Letterboxd before so I'll take the lazy way out this time.

    Watched the 2003 Director's Cut this time around just to be all crazy.

  • Sudden Impact

    Sudden Impact 1983

    ★★★½ Rewatched 25 Apr, 2016

    Go ahead, make my day.
    -Harry Callahan

    After The Enforcer took a slight dip in quality (still love it though) it took Dirty Harry seven years and Clint Eastwood in the director's chair for him to come back. It's the first and only Dirty Harry film he directed and I think that's significant for a number of reasons.

    First off the film combines themes from the first two films "criminal rights vs victim rights" (Dirty Harry) and the notion of…

  • Zellwood

    Zellwood 2013

    ½ Watched 24 Apr, 2016 2

    Back in the day I loved G4 Television. It was geared towards tech, video games, movies, pop culture, ect... with shows like X-Play, Code Monkeys and Electronic Playground. One show I'd watch almost on a daily basis though was Attack of the Show! as it was on just in time when I got off work for me to sit down and have supper with.

    The period I was watching it, it was hosted by Kevin Pereira and Olivia Munn (Psylocke!)…

  • Dream Cruise

    Dream Cruise 2007

    ★★½ Watched 24 Apr, 2016

    I'm a bit sad that my trek through Masters of Horror has now come to a close. Even the worst episodes were still fun to watch and in the best case scenarios I found little gems from directors I already loved.

    Season one ended with the brazen Takashi Miike directing an entry that was so outrageous that it didn't even air on television. For season two we don't get anyone as prolific in the director of Ring 0: Birthday, Norio…

  • Dial M for Murder

    Dial M for Murder 1954

    ★★★★½ Rewatched 24 Apr, 2016 2

    People don't commit murder on credit.
    -Tony Wendice

    What an odd film to be made in 3D. The entire story essentially takes place in one room with only one sequence that could even be considered an "action scene". Still though Alfred Hitchcock does the most with what he was forced to use, always placing actors at different levels in the background and always having objects in the foreground so there's always a 3D effect of some sort.

    Still though it's…

  • The Princess Bride

    The Princess Bride 1987

    ★★★★½ Rewatched 23 Apr, 2016 5

    Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
    -Inigo Montoya

    This is the kind of film that so triumphantly represents the 80s because it's ilk was practically killed off by CGI and the fact that we live in an age where a film that is geared towards that magic 18-to-49 year old demographic needs to be a blockbuster with a minimum budget of $100 million.

    This is a film about quirky characters, swashbuckling, giants, monsters,…

  • Escape from L.A.

    Escape from L.A. 1996

    ★★★ Rewatched 23 Apr, 2016

    Fuck you, I'm going to Hollywood...
    -Snake Plissken

    The bastard step-child of Escape from New York. John Carpenter's 90s output is a bit mixed with nothing reaching the greatness of his 70s and 80s films, but I still find them good while some exceed others with In the Mouth of Madness being the highlight of that Carpenter Era.

    Escape from L.A. never comes close to the original and is kinda disappointing as a sequel considering they tell essentially the same…

  • Escape from New York

    Escape from New York 1981

    ★★★★ Rewatched 22 Apr, 2016

    I'm an asshole...
    -Snake Plissken

    In the bleak future of 1997, Air Force One crashes on the maximum security prison island of Manhattan. Someone needs to go in and save the president from the unwanted scum of America. The only logical choice (since it's actually 1981) is Clint Eastwood, but in a stroke of genius we get something even better; Kurt Russell doing Clint Eastwood... with an eye patch! Enter Snake Plissken!

    Here's John Carpenter with yet another 80s defining…

  • One Wonderful Sunday

    One Wonderful Sunday 1947

    ★★★½ Watched 22 Apr, 2016

    Like almost everyone when I first got into Akira Kurosawa it was his samurai epics that first got my attention with the obvious first film being Seven Samurai, followed by Yojimbo and so on. Eventually I found his "non-samurai" masterpieces like Ikiru and High and Low worked their way into my favorite Kurosawa films and eventually I started exploring some real gems among his lesser talked about films like Drunken Angel.

    Needless to say he has an incredible filmography so…

  • Smothered

    Smothered 2016

    ★½ Watched 21 Apr, 2016 4

    This is a fucking hot mess...
    -Trixie

    On paper this looks great. As six "horror icons" and a professional blood burlesque dancer are hired to haunt an RV park after having little to no luck running the convention circuit but soon find out they are actually in a living horror movie on the opposite side they are used too. This gem was written and directed by The Dukes of Hazzard's John Schneider. Sadly he's most of the problem with this…