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Circle of Iron 1979
All I can say about this is that if Bruce Lee and James Coburn came to me and pitched a pseudo-philosophical martial arts sword and sorcery spaghetti western epic with Christopher Lee, Eli Wallach, Roddy McDowall, David Carradine in four roles (for which there's no explanation but in one of them he's blind, one he's a chimp, one he's Death and the other he karate chops a cow), a baffling plot, kung fu monkeys, a man slowly melting his own genitals in oil, bikinis, homoerotic flute fondling and a stupid ending, I reckon I'd be too scared to say no as well.
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Caligula 1979
It's hard (sorry) to know how to review Caligula, especially in its full length (sorry again) version. I've seen lots of 10/10 reviews on other sites, but you can't help feeling (ahem) that they are actually reviewing the behind-the-scenes story. That of course is incredible, hilarious and tragic - all things that the film should be but isn't. It's swollen (cough), sloppy (cough cough) and gets itself into a proper mess (nurse!). Mark Kermode famously said that there was a…
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Lifeforce 1985
OK, I admit it, I'm a fan of Lifeforce, and it's not just because of the vast swathes of nudity.* Not that I can't see the flaws - this is after all a film that (ahem) climaxes with a man able to save the earth by having sex, in fact he's so good at sex that he sends himself and his partner flying up into the air - but it is also fun, ambitious, scary and dare I say it…
