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  • 10 Cloverfield Lane

    10 Cloverfield Lane 2016

    ★★★★ Watched 11 Mar, 2016

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    10 CLOVERFIELD LANE is the metaphor about how to boil frogs as a movie, slowly ratcheting up the intensity while forcing you forget that the movie you're watching is supposed to be a horror movie, until the whole thing fucking explodes in your face. Alright, maybe I'm mixing metaphors a bit there.

    I'm not sure exactly what the connection between 10CL and CLOVERFIELD are, despite Abrams and company saying the two are "blood relatives". If anything, 10CL is the spiritual…

  • The Hateful Eight

    The Hateful Eight 2015

    ★★★★ Watched 28 Dec, 2015

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    THE HATEFUL EIGHT is, at heart, about lying. It's a film full of untrustworthy people in a setting where the only way to survive is to lie. The eight main players who inhabit our film exist in a grid of most to least trustworthy, and most to least trusting. The plot moves more like a game of Clue or Mafia, where each player has to discern who is lying about what without playing their hand as to what they're lying about.

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  • Snow White and the Huntsman

    Snow White and the Huntsman 2012

    ★★★½ Watched 01 Jun, 2012 3

    As stunning-but-lifeless as the corpse of a pageant queen, SW&TH attempts to add some edge to a classic fairy tale. Unfortunately, everyone involved in the creation of the film seemed to mistake sex and violence for maturity, and even in doing so wholeheartedly failed at one half of that equation, creating a relatively sexless (but fun) fantasy romp.

    The idea of turning Snow White into a low fantasy seems to make sense, what with the world currently in the thrall…

  • Star Wars

    Star Wars 1977

    ★★★★ Watched 07 Apr, 2015 1

    the citizen kane of movies about wars amongst the stars.