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  • Cloud Atlas

    Cloud Atlas

    ★★

    This film is basically the litmus test for seeing if someone doesn't know about cinema. If you think this is a good film, you know nothing about cinema. It's heavy-handed, cinematic flailing. Tired garbage.

  • Superman Returns

    Superman Returns

    ★★

    To be fair, Superman can only be a boring character. But I still just wanted it to end.

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  • Megan is Missing

    Megan is Missing

    ½

    Think of the most awful film you've seen.

    Think of the most mind-bendingly terrible piece of garbage conceivable. Baby Geniuses 2. Troll 2.

    That is a walk in the park compared to this.

    This is acted even worse. It's edited less competently and shot like a moron. Anyone who thinks this movie is anything but an exercise in complete... bad... is a dumbass that fell for the "OH MY GOD, SRS SUBJECT MATTERS GUYS IM SO AWARE!" bullshit they tried…

  • Star Wars

    Star Wars

    ★★★★½

    Lucas is best when he doesn't really have the reigns. He needs a lot of people on his level challenging him, and people in hands-on creative positions. Still, this film is just magic.