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  • Allied

    Allied 2016

    ★★ Watched 27 Nov, 2016

    ZEMECKIS: "Here's a movie with Pitt and Cotillard doing sexy double talk in beautiful costumes and having tense conversations with Nazis and banging in sandstorms."
    ME: "Hey, holy shit, I could watch two hours of this! This is great--"
    ZEMECKIS: "SIKE now Cotillard's a boring mom and housewife and you have to watch Brad Pitt behave like the absolute worst spy ever for over an hour HAHAHAHAHA I TRICKED YOU"
    ME: "Zemeckis you rotten son of a bitch"

  • Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

    Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them 2016

    ★★ Watched 26 Nov, 2016

    I expecto muchmorus.

Popular reviews

  • Sucker Punch

    Sucker Punch 2011

    ½ Rewatched 24 Aug, 2013 2

    In case you were wondering, this is still one the ugliest, most brainless, most unpleasant, and most fucking terrible movies made in your lifetime.

  • I Am Wrath

    I Am Wrath 2016

    ½ Watched 23 May, 2016 2

    John Travolta actually says "I am Wrath" in this movie.