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  • Chappie

    Chappie 2015

    ★★ Watched 28 Aug, 2015

    Anti-cargo shorts propaganda.

  • Seventh Son

    Seventh Son 2014

    ½ Rewatched 26 Aug, 2015

    It took me five tries to finish this movie. It is one of the most baffling films I've ever seen.

    A cardboard cut-out of Ben Barnes might have more charisma than Ben Barnes. I've told this joke before, mostly as hyperbole... but seriously, a cut-out would've held my attention better. It might actually have more presence.

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  • Sucker Punch

    Sucker Punch 2011

    ½ Rewatched 24 Aug, 2013 2

    In case you were wondering, this is still one the ugliest, most brainless, most unpleasant, and most fucking terrible movies made in your lifetime.

  • Jupiter Ascending

    Jupiter Ascending 2015

    ★★★★ Watched 05 Feb, 2015 2

    I read a lot of reviews that specifically called out the concept of bees sensing royalty as "stupid." I asked my Twitter followers why this bit about the bees was stupider than elements in critically-acclaimed sci-fi space operas, such as The Force or a talking tree that only says "I Am Groot." No one has given me an answer. Probably because there isn't one, other than "Because I like those movies, and I didn't like this one."

    I get not…