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  • The Quarantine Hauntings 2015

    ½ Watched 26 Jan, 2015

    Consider this a zero-star review.

    I'll just copy/paste what I wrote on Facebook.

    I feel like I am morally obliged to put out a PSA about a new Australian horror movie called The Quarantine Hauntings.

    Let me be clear: This is the worst movie I have ever seen.

    It is barely visible at all. It's so underlit that I suspect they didn't use any lighting at all. Almost the entire movie is mis-framed in one way or another. A lot…

  • The last: Naruto the movie 2014

    ★★ Watched 26 Jan, 2015

    What I expected: Magical ninjas.

    What I got: Full-blown soap opera. Featuring magical ninjas.

    For what it's worth, I have never seen an episode of Naruto.

Popular reviews

  • Gone Girl 2014

    ★★★★★ Watched 01 Oct, 2014

    One of the year's very best movies.

    David Fincher never gives me exactly what I'm expecting. Here, I wasn't even close. I'm told that while the plot sticks close to the book, the utterly bizarre sense of humour is new for the movie.

    It's a tone that turns an insane plot into something truly special. Fincher knew how crazy this story was, and by the time it gets where it's going, it felt like the plot itself was part of…

  • Transformers: Age of Extinction 2014

    ★★ Watched 25 Jun, 2014

    Look, it's exactly as good as the last one was. What that means depends on who you are.

    For my part, while it's one of the biggest special effects spectaculars of the year, it's still an hour too long, and filled with humour that doesn't work and action you can't see.

    It's almost incredible how little replacing the lead characters changed the movie. Wahlberg is supposed to be the hero, but he's repetitive and annoying about his daughter the whole…