RSS feed for Silent J
  • The Self Destruction of the Ultimate Warrior 2005

    ★★★½ Watched 06 Mar, 2014 1

    Whether you love it or think it's stupid, you gotta admit wrestling is some of the most fascinating shit when you think about it. Specifically from a business perspective.

    Yeah, the idea of two guys oiled down from head to toe wearing tights pretending to hit each other for 20 minutes sounds incredibly silly, but behind the scenes is where the real interest for the business kicks in. At least for me. That's where the best stories worth telling come…

  • Angels in America 2003

    ★★★★★ Rewatched 04 Mar, 2014 4

    This epic film features Emma Thompson as an angel of the lord saying "The stiffening of your penis is of no consequence." and coining the phrase "Orgasma asmada." in the same scene.

    Therefore, this is the greatest thing ever. Your argument is invalid.

  • Non-Stop 2014

    ★★★½ Watched 03 Mar, 2014 5

    Well, it stopped.
    It's not quite Taken 3, but it could've been worse.

    I think the big problem with this film (aside from some plot contrivances or just silly things you'd expect from a Neeson movie) is that while at some points the suspense works, it's not amplified like it should have. Like I never feel like the stakes are high. If a guy says he's going to kill someone on the plane every 20 minutes, Neeson should've been in…

  • Angels in America 2003

    ★★★★★ Watched 01 Mar, 2014

    Wow. Just wow. My God. I think I've found my new favorite film.

    Now, I don't know about you, but when I go into any film that was originally titled "A Gay Fantasia on National Themes" when it was on stage, expectations are usually pretty high. Saying they were exceeded would be an understatement. This was broadcasted on television screens about 10 years ago. The play came out about 20 years ago. The fact that the story and its themes…

  • Philomena 2013

    ★½ Watched 28 Feb, 2014

    As of now, I have seen every film nominated for Best Picture this year.
    I guess I chose the worst for last.

    For what reason was this film was nominated? Is it because it shits on members of the Catholic Church? Is it because Judi Dench’s performance was so good they just HAD to nominate the whole film? Is it because it’s your usual run of the mill sappy crowd pandering flick Oscars jizz over? Is there any reason, for…

  • Captain Phillips 2013

    ★★★★½ Watched 28 Feb, 2014 5

    The extra half star is for those intense last five minutes. The rest of the film is incredible in it's own right, but those last five minutes man...fuck.

    What can be said about this film that hasn't been said already? Tom Hanks proves that after all these years, he's still got it and gives what I'd argue to be the best performance of his career. Barkhad Abdi, in his film debut, is a powerhouse villain who you even find yourself…

  • The To Do List 2013

    ★½ Watched 21 Feb, 2014 9

    This is one film I didn't need to check off my to do list.

    You're better off watching Backdoor Sluts 9. Or Beaches. Whichever strikes your fancy.

  • Adult World 2013

    ★★ Watched 16 Feb, 2014 4

    "Love. Love until you hate. But learn to hate your love and then forgive your hate for loving it."

    When we're young, most of us are excited about entering adulthood. Exploring a new world from a new perspective with new possibilities. When we finally do enter it, we're quick to find out that it isn't all that it's cracked out to be nor what we expect it to be. It seems director Scott Cofey is trying to put emphasis on…

  • Unbreakable 2000

    ★★★★★ Watched 13 Feb, 2014

    Sequel to Die Hard 3 in which Zeus works another case with John McClane but ends up crippling himself in the process. To leave the past behind him, John stops being a cop, remarries with someone else, and takes a job as a security guard. But Zeus cannot forget the past so easily. Bitter that kids make fun of him and call him Mr. Glass, Zeus seeks revenge on McClane by trying to break him in the most physical and mental way possible, but how can he break someone who is...


    Coming to a theatre near you (14 years ago)

  • The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters 2007

    ★★★★★ Watched 13 Feb, 2014 6

    Fuck Billy Mitchell.
    Fuck his tie.
    Fuck his American tie.
    Fuck his tie with the shitty looking trees.
    Fuck his Miami Vice haircut.
    Fuck his shoes.
    Fuck his videotapes.
    Fuck his shit eating grin.
    Fuck his smooth ass beard.
    Fuck Billy Mitchell.

    Fuck that motherfucker.

  • The Lego Movie 2014

    ★★★★★ Watched 11 Feb, 2014 5

    I was hoping this movie would at least be better than stepping on a Lego.

    Turns out it's better than building Legos when I was a kid.

  • Nebraska 2013

    ★★★★½ Watched 09 Feb, 2014

    With another Best Picture nominee that I've never heard of, I had really low expectations. I didn't even know what this is about. Surprisingly, it ended up being a brilliant character study unlike any kind I've seen in the sub-genre.

    It stars Bruce Dern as a senile old man who thinks he's won a million dollars thanks to a scam letter he received in the mail. Frustrated by his father's insistence to receive his winnings in Nebraska, his son, played…