RSS feed for Silent J
  • Final Exam

    Final Exam 1981

    Watched 27 Apr, 2015

    So instead of studying for my final exam, I watched Final Exam instead.

    Was it worth it? Hell. No.

    Watching this painfully slow, dumb, corny, dated, and in some cases really fucked up movie when I should be studying for finals is one of the worst decisions I've made in a long time. And I've made some horrible fucking decisions as of late.

    Pray for me that I pass this exam.

    UPDATE: I ACED THAT BITCH

  • Stretch

    Stretch 2014

    ★★★ Watched 26 Apr, 2015

    Two things I learned from this movie:

    1. When he's not playing super serious in his usually dark and/or super serious movies, Patrick Wilson is a pretty funny lead. He should do more comedies.

    2. Chris Pine is a WAY better character actor than leading straight man. He's fine as the charming lead that plays it straight in most of his movies, but when he's told to just have a ball, he runs with it better than anything he's ever…

  • Boyhood

    Boyhood 2014

    ★★★★★ Watched 25 Apr, 2015 1

    As much as I hate to bite my tongue and admit I was wrong, I have to admit, Boyhood was not the steaming pile of dogshit I was expecting it to be.

    I had been putting off this movie for a long time because I was certain that I was going to hate it. The trailers made me think that this was going to be nothing but a 3 hour long cheesy snozzfest with nothing to it but a gimmick.…

  • Matchstick Men

    Matchstick Men 2003

    ★★★★½ Rewatched 22 Apr, 2015 3

    One of the worst things about studying in the psychology field is that it opens your eyes to all of the bullshit you find in movies like these.

    Don't get me wrong, this is still one of my favorite movies and possibly my favorite Cage performance, but as far as Cage's therapist prescribing him menopause pills to get Cage to see that his anxieties are all in his head...yeah, no. Just no. First off, super unethical for a therapist to…

  • Predestination

    Predestination 2014

    ★★★★★ Watched 18 Apr, 2015 4

    Woah.

    That was fucking trippy.

  • Detention of the Dead

    Detention of the Dead 2013

    ★★½ Watched 14 Apr, 2015

    Imagine if zombies invaded The Breakfast Club.

    While lacking the heart and likable characters up to par with the John Hughes classic or the cleverness to make a worthy zombie comedy, it still has it's moments that keep you from switching it off (though the first 15-20 minutes are painfully bad and hard to get through) and a handful of stupid funny moments that make up for two handfuls of stupid moments.

    If you need a decent movie just to pass the time, Detention of the Dead is a decent pick.

  • Dark Skies

    Dark Skies 2013

    ★★★★ Watched 14 Apr, 2015

    It's not easy to make a good alien movie nowadays. We've seen so many versions of Close Encounters, Body Snatchers, and Poltergeist (ghost movie, but trust me, it's a good example in this context) that it's rare we find a really good and fresh alien movie.

    Dark Skies is that refreshing alien movie.

    It starts off as a creepy, atmospheric horror movie that takes its sweet time to build up to it's suspense until it slowly becomes a truly terrifying…

  • Only God Forgives

    Only God Forgives 2013

    Watched 12 Apr, 2015

    Yesterday, upon seeing Lost River and seeing how Ryan Gosling's directorial style was similar to that of Nicholas Winding Refn and noticing how everyone thought his style was reminiscent to Only God Forgives, it reminded me that I never finished watching Only God Forgives. When it first came out, I thought early on that Only God Forgives sucked too badly to finish but now after damn near loving Lost River, I figured maybe my opinion could have changed. If I…

  • Django Unchained

    Django Unchained 2012

    ★★★★★ Rewatched 11 Apr, 2015

    I don't know what else to add to this movie. I've seen this a bunch of other times before (though this is the first I've seen this in years) and you all know how great it is by now so I'll just say this:

    1. Jamie Foxx and Christoph Waltz make for the best Ebony & Ivory type duo since Gibson/Glover from the Lethal Weapon franchise.

    2. Samuel L. Jackson is the biggest show stealer; not just because he was almost…

  • Lost River

    Lost River 2014

    ★★★★½ Watched 11 Apr, 2015

    Around this time two years ago, word got out that Ryan Gosling was directing his first film and I couldn't have been more excited. One of my favorite actors directing a movie in my hometown starring my favorite Doctor Who guy? Sign me up!

    Then, two years passed. Two years since, I stopped being a Doctor Who fan, I stopped sipping the Gosling koolaid, and after a while, I lost hope that this movie was even getting released. In fact,…

  • Vehicle 19

    Vehicle 19 2013

    Watched 10 Apr, 2015

    Paul Walker has one of those filmographies that are filled with enough crap films that make you realize that he deserved much better compared to the consistent solid performances he gave.

    This is one of those crap films.

    I really wish he had a better agent before he died.

  • Let's Go to Prison

    Let's Go to Prison 2006

    ★★★★★ Rewatched 10 Apr, 2015

    I've lost track of how many times I've seen this movie and it still manages to be one of the funniest movies I've ever seen.