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  • Downloading Nancy 2008

    Watched 30 Aug, 2014

    Won't rate this because I didn't finish it, it does too great a job at alienating its audience. I was reeled in by the Lifetime-esque title and the even more Lifetime-y synopsis ("An unhappy wife orders a guy she meets over the Internet to kill her, but the two of them fall in love") - but then with Maria Bello and Rufus Sewell starring. Mumblecore Lifetime movies, it should be a genre.

    There's very little dialogue so the extent of…

  • Chef 2014

    ★★★ Watched 28 Aug, 2014 2

    "It's not hard to make people happy, there are certain things you can put on the menu that will make everybody happy. If you put ahi tuna on the menu, it will sell out, it's garantueed, you know that."

    Jon Favreau knows that if you make a film about cooking, with lots of close-up shots of things being chopped and sliced and diced, people will be happy. If you play some Al Green, 'A Message to Rudy', and 'Cavern' by…

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  • War Horse 2011

    ★★ Watched 14 Feb, 2014 35

    What a shitfest. I would probably have liked this film better if it had been about a cat. Or, hell, even about that goose that walks around on the farm at the beginning of this film. That was a great goose.

    For a film called 'War Horse', it takes a long time for the 'war'-element to enter, so for the first 50 minutes, it's mainly 'horse' - and I happened to skip the horse part in my coming of age.…

  • Get Over It 2001

    ★★★½ Watched 17 Feb, 2014 6

    Holy frosted-lipgloss and metallic-eyeshadow, Batman! If there was ever the perfect cinematic time capsule for 2001, it's this film. That extra half star is purely out of nostalgia.

    The opening to this film is the perfect example of why late 90s/early 00s teen films were so great - it's completely over the top and everyone is well aware it is. Within 5 minutes, Vitamin C (who had one mediocre hit and still has a starring role in this as a…