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  • Everest

    Everest 2015

    ★★★½ Watched 07 Nov, 2015

    Characters are what save this film.

    Mind you, it's not bad, but it's not the action-adventure extravaganza that you expect when watching the trailers.

    Despite it not being advertised right, Everest is actually a decent movie. I've heard plenty of gripes that it takes too long to set up, but honestly the set up is one of the better parts of the film. Character motivation is a big part of this story. Which, in the case of being stuck on…

  • Death Spa

    Death Spa 1988

    ★★ Watched 04 Nov, 2015 1

    A ghost takes over a computerized health club called Starbody Health Spa and just starts fuckin' murdering everyone.

    Evil twin.
    Obscure macho water play.
    Swimsuits for workout clothes.
    Super short man-shorts.
    A porche.
    80's boobs.
    Bitchin' modern mansion.
    Exploding hand.
    Weird sexual tension between siblings.
    A corrupt lawyer.
    Squirting blood.
    A goofy-ass brit who serves no purpose.
    Tense build ups that lead to a prank.
    Fat cop.
    Bad-ass female cop.
    Paranormal investigator.
    Solid soundtrack.
    Marti Gras party.


Popular reviews

  • Under the Skin

    Under the Skin 2014

    ★★★★½ Watched 01 Jul, 2014 2

    This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    I took a day to ruminate on this film.

    That was a good idea.

    Scarlett Johansson has slowly, but surely proven herself to be a very capable actress. Her sexiness in this film is not heavy handed in the least, which I half expected. However, her performance is chillingly real and seductive. The use of real people and hidden cameras brings this story much closer to reality.

    Long shots, extremely wide shots, and the grey Scotland countryside give a subtle…

  • Transformers: Age of Extinction

    Transformers: Age of Extinction 2014

    ★½ Watched 28 Jun, 2014

    I won't say that it was good, or even that entertaining. It's a total turd. But, it's the Bayiest Micheal Bay movie ever Bayed. Which means it's nothing but one-liners and explosions. It's a good turn your brain off film. Nothing more. No real cinematic story. Just lots of splosions.