WAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

At least it's better than 300. And Troy. And the Clash of the Titans remake. But that's still not saying much. Cinematography was awesome. Script was terrible. And Stephen McHattie was wasted.

What a fantastically stupid movie. It makes no sense, everyone is chewing scenery and now that I think about it, it makes even less sense. Despite a few lulls, this film is chock full of crazy 80s action. Maybe the best way to describe Tango & Cash is What if Crank was made in 1989, only it had Statham AND somebody else in it. The fact that Stallone is in this movie only reinforces to me how much of a swing and a miss The Expendables was. It's still a terribly made movie, but terrible in many of the right ways. Bonus half star for Clint Howard.

It's great to watch such a collection of stars, some now immortals and some forgotten to time, but the humour in this film is so broad that it's lost all impact. As soon as Jimmy Durante literally kicked the bucket I knew I was in for a rough time. Full disclosure - I never finished this film. And considering it clocks in at 3 hours, it's hard to blame myself for not finishing.