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  • 31

    31

    31 is perhaps the greatest Rob Zombie parody ever made. The problem is, it was made by Rob Zombie.

    I'm sorry, but I just found this to be such a miserable experience. The idea that this was made by the same guy who gave us THE DEVIL'S REJECTS is almost legitimately depressing to me. It feels like such a HUGE step backward for Zombie as a filmmaker...and that's coming from someone who didn't really like his last few movies all…

  • Underworld: Blood Wars

    Underworld: Blood Wars

    ★★★½

    I'm not here to tell you UNDERWORLD: BLOOD WARS is a "good" movie, but I'm definitely here to tell you I enjoyed the hell out of it. I've actually been on-board with this series from the beginning, to varying degrees (I'm not a huge fan of the prequel third film, but at least it has really fun performances from Michael Sheen and Bill Nighy). They scratch the same sort of dumb-fun itch that the RESIDENT EVIL films do for me.…

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  • Train to Busan

    Train to Busan

    ★★★★½

    If you know me, you know that zombie movies are my jam. Always have been, probably always will be. Though, like anyone else, my engagement level with the sub-genre has ebbed and flowed. During the '90s, I eagerly sought out and devoured every zombie movie I could get my hands on. This continued into the 2000's...for a time. In the mid-'00s, I reviewed 31 different zombie movies every October, four years in a row, for a website I wrote for.…

  • Shin Godzilla

    Shin Godzilla

    ½

    SHIN C-SPAN, is what they should have called this turd.

    If "bureaucracy porn" was a genre, this would be its masterpiece. It's essentially two hours of watching roughly 500 different characters hold a series of meetings, in which they mostly discuss scheduling future meetings. Every half hour or so, the filmmakers remember this is a Godzilla movie, and finally cut back to perhaps the most boring interpretation of the character ever, one that just slowly walks in a straight line…