What?!? One star for THE EXORCIST?!? ARE YOU INSANE?!!?!

Maybe. All I know is that I've never been able to enjoy Friedkin's iconic horror hit. Partly this can be blamed on my lack of religious beliefs, which renders the thought of possession, demons, and devils as ridiculous rather than terrifying. Partly it can be blamed on its pace and seriousness, which have always left me frustrated and bored. And another part can probably just be blamed on the kind of asshole contrarianism that sometimes makes us hate films everyone else adores.

This contrarianism would explain why I love the much-loathed sequel, and had Linda Blair sign my ROLLER BOOGIE poster when I met her last year.

And if this review makes you mad, wait until you see what I do with the original DAWN OF THE DEAD.