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  • Jupiter Ascending

    Jupiter Ascending 2015

    ★★★ Watched 17 Feb, 2015

    This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    A complete and utter mess of a film.

    ... And yet, also a somehow likable one.

    I'll begin with the one thing above all else for which I admire the Wachowskis' work: their handling of action. The Matrix's blend of US/HK/Japanese action elements was a trendsetter, fluid and always clear what was going on, with slow-motion and impossible camera moves used in a way that was - for once - appropriate to the story and setting. Speed Racer still looks…

  • Punisher: War Zone

    Punisher: War Zone 2008

    ★★ Watched 08 Feb, 2015

    Probably the orange-and-blue-iest movie I've ever seen.

    This is a sprited defence of the movie, which I enjoyed reading, but I'm not persuaded - I just kept thinking how I'd prefer to watch Shoot 'em Up or Sin City, or play a Max Payne game, for this sort of comic gangster nonsense brutality. (Or, for that matter, watch the 2004 Thomas Jane version, which I rather liked.)

    I enjoyed the punchline to the parkour gag and the bit where Jigsaw recruits three ethnically-diverse gangs against the backdrop of a US flag, though.

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  • The Dark Knight Rises

    The Dark Knight Rises 2012

    ★★★½ Watched 23 Jul, 2012 4

    This review reportedly contains spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    RIDDLER: Riddle-me-this, Gothamites! What just-released movie about our Batty arch-nemesis has numerous annoying inconsistencies; strains believability irritatingly frequently; is not as good as either The Dark Knight or Batman Begins; is undeniably very flawed... but nevertheless contains some tremendously well-done, spectacular and uplifting individual moments and sequences? My friends and I will attempt to solve this quandary.

    HARLEY QUINN: Ahhh, shaddap, ya big green piece of punctuation! I gotta say, even though there's no-one in this movie that lights up…

  • On Her Majesty's Secret Service

    On Her Majesty's Secret Service 1969

    ★★★★½ Rewatched 22 Jul, 2012 1

    The first time I saw most of the Bond films was when ITV showed all of them over consecutive weeks in 1999, in the run up to the release if The World is Not Enough. However, even though I videotaped OHMSS at that time, it went unwatched for several years. I really regretted that, because when it was finally viewed, it turned out to be one of my favourite of all the 007 movies.

    If there are three things that…