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  • Deadly Prey

    Deadly Prey

    ★★★½

    Colonel Hogan!
    What do you want?
    They're all dead!
    Dead Tom's dead?
    That's why we call him Dead Tom!

    I'm paraphrasing since I don't even know which way is up after this movie. I have so many questions. Why does he need to eat so desperately so soon? Why must he spit-wash the worm? Where did he get the caveman club prop? Why is everyone's best insult 'stupid bastards'? Is a grenade in the pants a euphemism? And last but not least, which mercenary said "let's put him in daisy dukes cause reasons"?

  • Santo and Blue Demon Against the Monsters

    Santo and Blue Demon Against the Monsters

    ★★★½

    Mexico in the 70's was a scary place. Apparently monsters would rove in packs and wrestle anyone in sight.

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  • Confessional

    Confessional

    Without any weight on acting talent, and story aside (and it's a fairly lame story), there's just nothing real or organic feeling here. It contradicts the premise that everyone acts like a news anchor and switches cameras for different sections of their story, punctuating and dramatizing their so-called confessions. You want a bunch of people vlogging about their side of a story? Fine, make that the premise. But only a very very small minority, if any, people will act like this when stuck in a booth and asked to "TELL THE TRUTH OR FACE THE CONSEQUENCES".

    In summary, NOPE.

  • Dangerous Lies

    Dangerous Lies

    ★★½

    I believe my exact words to my spouse were "it's pretty entertaining for the soapy piece of crap that it is"

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  • Eko Eko Azarak: Wizard of Darkness

    Eko Eko Azarak: Wizard of Darkness

    ★★★½

    It's basically a Japanese Harry Potter. With Satanic rituals. And voodoo. And nudity. And beheadings. And gore. And lesbians.

  • Love Exposure

    Love Exposure

    ★★★★★

    It is so rare to find a movie that's so good it hurts. Especially in dramas or comedy. And even more so when it has a four hour runtime. That combo is basically impossible. Love Exposure is the impossible.