Favorite films

  • Man of La Mancha
  • Alice in Wonderland
  • Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead
  • Shoot 'Em Up

Recent activity

All
  • Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny

    ½

  • Private Benjamin

    ★★½

  • Elf Bowling the Movie

    ½

  • Kickboxer

    ★★★½

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  • King Dong

    King Dong

    ★★★★★

    Back in 2013, I was a sophomore in college. I'd made friends with some folks living down the hall from me in what was then Aspen Dorm at Northern Arizona University. I'd had connections like this my freshman year, but these visits felt particularly special, since the people I'd made friends with were far more on my wavelength and didn't have other friends from rich families who'd whinge about how they only had three thousand dollars left in their bank…

Recent reviews

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  • Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny

    Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny

    ½

    Gettin' Weird With Santa!

    In the deepest recesses of my mind, there's a nasty goblin voice insisting I simply must give Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny a five-star rating, on the grounds it is vanishingly rare to find a film whose entire existence is dedicated only to causing and spreading pain. I shan't listen to this voice, for if I do standards are well and truly dead, but I understand why it's there. Under no circumstance can I imagine…

  • Private Benjamin

    Private Benjamin

    ★★½

    Comedy Challenge! Theme thirty-six - a comedy starring a former Laugh-In cast member!

    There's a gulf between the movie Private Benjamin could be and the movie Private Benjamin wants to be, a gulf the movie as made simply can't clear. The base premise of a spoiled Jewish young woman who's duped into joining the army after her husband's unexpected death doesn't seem like much special at first - the comedy's in about the same zip code as the jokes and…

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  • Elf Bowling the Movie

    Elf Bowling the Movie

    ½

    Gettin' Weird With Santa!

    Terribly, terribly sorry to do this, but I simply must directly engage with the greatest sin present in Elf Bowling: The Movie: The Great North Pole Strike. It is, I'm grieved to report, yet another example of a video game movie adaptation that is not adequately faithful to its source material.

    When it comes to the original Elf Bowling game from the late 90s, you know where you are at all times. Santa is a slave…

  • City Lights

    City Lights

    ★★★★½

    Film School Drop-Outs 2018! Week 2 Retro - The Silent Comedy!

    Having reflected for the better part of 24 hours before writing this review, I think the funniest thing about Charlie Chapin's Tramp are the moments when you aren't sure whether he's cottoned on or not. Take the spaghetti eating scene for instance, where his expression wavers between disbelief and satisfaction, culminating in a head turn and slow standing up with brows knit... only for it to turn out he's…