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  • The Beguiled

    The Beguiled

    ★★★½

    A musty, woozy melodrama about female desire, whose softcore sensibility builds up to a darkly hilarious money shot of Colin Farrell's Union soldier from the ladies' perspective, rather than from Clint Eastwood's POV in the Don Siegel adaptation.

    Sofia Coppola's film may have arthouse leanings, but there's no other time you could release this humid melodrama than at the peak of summer, with Nicole Kidman, Elle Fanning and a spectacularly repressed Kirsten Dunst all putting in a fine show of…

  • Cars 3

    Cars 3

    ★★½

    "I never really thought of myself is a brand," Lightning McQueen says, to gales of laughter from every die-hard Pixar fan who can't figure out why these movies are still a thing. Still, after the terrible spy shenanigans of Cars 2, (the studio's worst by some distance) this one has some catching up to do in terms of sports movie tropes.

    Brazenly, it somehow manages to be every Rocky sequel at once. Lightning McQueen dabbles in embarrassing sponsorship deals (II)…

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  • Ghostbusters

    Ghostbusters

    ★★★★

    Hey, guess what? It's nothing like the trailers. It's actually funny, actually scary, and, because there isn't a bottom half to read under a movie, it's 100% dickhead proof.

    The one thing that nobody seemed to actually buy ahead of this was that it could be both a remake and a passing of the torch. It turns out that it's both of those things and while it certainly bows to the original as much as, say, The Force Awakens does…

  • Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

    ★½

    It may be a little premature, but we already have the first President Trump era comic book movie. I'm not even talking about the story, in which two emasculated rich white men blame an immigrant for what's wrong with the world.

    Just like Trump's campaign for the nomination, it's stupid, hateful, and by the time you've just deciphered one utterly insensible thing it's said or done, it'll have done five more. And depressingly, despite all of this, people are probably…