Favorite films

  • Lisa and the Devil
  • Female Prisoner Scorpion: Jailhouse 41
  • Psycho
  • Once Upon a Time in the West

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  • Manos: The Hands of Fate

  • The Black Cat

    ★★★★★

  • The Giant Spider Invasion

  • The Devil-Doll

    ★★½

Recent reviews

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  • The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

    The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

    ★★

    If you thought Orlando Bloom was bland before, wait until you spend what seems like half of an already overlong movie watching his side quests.

  • Blonde

    Blonde

    ★★

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    On the way to an abortion, Marilyn Monroe's car passes a STOP sign, at which point Monroe changes her mind and screams at her driver to take her back home. Subtlety is not this film's strong point. It's a somewhat fictionalized, CliffsNotes version of Marilyn Monroe's life, loves, and career with half the story missing. Monroe's husbands come, but we never see them go. They just disappear, like the fictionalized father over whom fictional Marilyn obsesses. Her movie career seems…

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  • Fun in Balloon Land

    Fun in Balloon Land

    ½

    This movie is a lie. There is no fun in Balloon Land. There are only madness and horror.

  • Earth vs. the Spider

    Earth vs. the Spider

    ★★★

    "Earth vs. the Spider" Drinking Game: Watch "Earth vs. the Spider" with the closed captions turned on, then drink every time "[spider screeches]" appears onscreen.