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  • Fertilize the Blaspheming Bombshell!

    Fertilize the Blaspheming Bombshell!

    ★★★

    Pretty much a snoozer, but multiple people catch fire, there's an unexpected amount of Mad Max-style car action, and the end is really abrupt in a way I found amusing. 

    So, three stars. It's not like it means anything.

  • No One Lives

    No One Lives

    ★★★

    Really dumb, but in a way that amused me. And I like Ryuhei Kitamura.

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  • Star Wars: The Force Awakens

    Star Wars: The Force Awakens

    ★★★★

    I doubt this rating still feels right after any thought.

  • Casablanca

    Casablanca

    ★★★★★

    Just closed the most inexcusable gap in my movie history. No point giving this anything other than five stars.